Wednesday, March 30, 2016

If I Had ANOTHER Biliion Dollars...

Three years ago, I covered what I would try to do if I happened upon a billion dollars.   After the billion-plus Powerball earlier this year, followed by a few memes that appeared later, I decided to revisit it.

... I would buy you a monkey
(Haven't you always wanted a monkey?)

Again, I've won a billion dollars (post taxes, if I want to be greedy I'm going as close to Scrooge McDuck style as I can).  How would that change my gaming lifestyle?

Three years ago, I would forcibly relocate people back into the general area, perhaps even combine their minds for a start-up company.    Perhaps I'm waning nostalgic, but I'll stick to my eternal idea of getting everybody on a cruise ship for a 10-day cruise, eight hours of every sea day dedicated to gaming. 

What about buying product lines and companies!   A couple of my ideas proved necessary over the last couple of  years, especially the first. 

Here's the list:
  • Chaosium - Not any more.  The takeover was necessary, and after three years, the 7th Edition rules are actually on a slow boat from Hong Kong.
  • Steve Jackson - I'd still secretly finance a new edition of TOON before they launch a Kickstarter for it.
  • Topps - I'd still buy all the gaming lines/licenses and be a benevolent dictator with them.. 
  • Legions of Steel - If I could clean up this train wreck, I'd get Reaper to produce the figures using their Bones technology.  Most of the figures are clean lines and tight sculpts that would come out great, but seriously, the UNE Superfortress and other mammoth vehicles could conceivably come out and be affordable!
  • Burning Plastic - Yeah, I already have this, per se, but I could finish the 2nd Edition, print off 10,000 copies and distribute them to the masses.  Perhaps I could find out if I could buy the rights to the classic moulds and release a box set, just like the ones you could get out of the back of a comic book, in days gone by, only this time the figures are normal size.  In addition to that I could throw a pile of money at the true genius behind the game, just to avoid lawsuits
  • Burning Plastic -  "Real Rules"  I'd love to start playtesting actual rules for skirmish warfare using BP,  regular soldier vs regular soldier, not crazy self-destructing robots.
  •  I'd do the same for his Agitator: the RPG.
  • Gnome Wars - Everything I mentioned three years ago is still up in the air, so I would finish writing the fluff for 3rd Edition and commission some new sculpts.  Lon at Brigade can keep control. 
  • TWERPS - A leather bound TWERPS Compendium, even if it's a unique copy.  Same with Risus.  Both for the sheer irony of it.
I would go crazy with my gaming purchases:
  • Call of Cthulhu - now that I'm now investing into the company, I would simply go to the Chaosium website and order close to one of everything.  All the small press items they don't stock, or are out of stock I'll get directly through those companies. Cthulhu has been very very good to me these last couple of years.  They should get rewarded.
  • Miniature Building Authority - stays pretty much the same as before.  not one of everything (some things I'll need more than one!), but a nice Middle Eastern set, a European two set, a Spanish building set, and some Africian/Polynesian grass huts shouldn't fill up an entire room of my new house (unless I drain the indoor swimming pool and they're all set up in there.)  No need for the new castle stuff...
  • Hackmaster - the 5th Edition GM Guide and Hacklopedia of Beasts.  Those will look good on my mahoghany barrister bookcase shelves.
  • Gnomish Space Marines -  I will blow up the already overpriced eBay market on Squats to assemble my army, using some Hasslefree figures for power armor.  Lots of camo, hunter orange, plus some Nascar insignia for the power armor, not because I like that, but because I can!
  • Olley's Armies:  I would go out and obtain most of the Scrunt molds that have been sold over the years to make everything available. 
  • Eureka - All the Mice/Frogs/Turtles one could stand
  • Teddy Bears - I would pay top dollar for all of them to keep them in circulation.
  • Brigade Games - complete figure lines to run my Tanga Campaign "accurately".
  • Formula De - all the boards... and somehow run them together like a bad Cannonball Run.
  • Magic - I have played in years, but I would assemble my beloved Treefolk deck to its former Alpha glory, then purchases the appropriate cards from each set so I can play the same deck with old, modern, and new styles of cards.
  • I may even buy mutliple Black Lotuses just to get them out of circulation. 
Write my books
  • I could write the ultimate book on the Samoan Civil Wars, and write up orders of battle for wargaming purpose.  I would enjoy those research trips to Samoa and New Zealand.
  • Burning Plastic, 2nd Edition
  • Gnome Wars 3.0 (I've already volunteered to be editor, at least a proofreader.)
  • The Encyclopedia of the Gnome World - a long term project for Gnome Wars covering the history of the Gnomes at War, from the mythical era until the Spanish Rice Uncivil War.  I'll do my best to incorporate all non-Brigade product lines that are appropriate (such as using Eureka Teddy Bears as African Askaris, frogs as savages, etc.)
And of course, if I feel like recreating Brewster's Millions and need a money pit to legally waste money, I could open a comic/gaming store.  Whether it's the Pegleg Gnome, or Viking Comics and Games, or I just buy whatever exists legally of Dreamscape Comics and build a new empire of geekdom with it, this could keep me out of worse trouble.  Plus it would help employ those don't qualify under the computer/internet start-up idea. 

Most importantly, I might have some blasted time to paint!  And let the girls paint their stuff too!

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