Lost Dispatches of Feraso #21 - Marauding Lagomorphs

8th of the Month of OctDec in the Imperial Year of 1021, the Reign of Krugraf Mykul I of Ras-Prythax

WEISSMACH LETTER #2

Village of Oshpenchin, Gran Duchy of Oppollo, The Weissmach

To His Lordship, the Viscount Wilfrick of Verbobonc,

After my last letter reviewed a simple geography lesson of the region, I must warn My Lord that our first tale is simply outrageous, yet I will affirm to any court or any god of any land that this was completely true.

We quickly traversed the poorly named Duchies of Oświęcim, Zator and Toszek.  There are lands owned by common gentlemen in Verbobonc which reach further than these so-called "Duchies."

Most of the other traffic on the road did not seem too helpful.  The most gracious gave us a knowing nod and continued on their way, the worst were a band of hobgoblins that completely underestimated the rags covering up our armor.

With the Gran Duchy of Oppollo less than a half day's ride, we took a quick break on the side of the road.   A few moments of respite later, we were invaded by a group of... talking rabbits.  I'm quite sure our food and drink were not tainted in the least, as a rabbit wearing a vest and holding a number of ledgers in its front paws (arms?) was running on its hind legs.  Pursuing it were four other rabbits, each three foot tall, this quartet covered in plate armor and maniacally wielding battle axes.   With such a peculiar event, we only felt obliged to follow suit.  We made it through a number of hedgerows until falling through a hole engulfing an old tree stump.

Doom Bunnies?

After a fall through a dark hole which felt like it lasted an eternity, we saw a light at the bottom and slowly floated down to a forest.  The four weaponized rabbits were on the opposite side of the clearing although, as they spotted us, we realized they were nearly 30 foot tall (or we had shrunk to mere inches perhaps).  We scurried through the woods, desperately searching for a hiding spot.    As the rabbit warriors ripped apart the woods, we uncovered a small glade with a pedestal.  Upon the pedestal was a finely crafted dwaven warhammer with a simple sign that read "Throw Me. "   Murag Mountainhammer, our dwarven companion, couldn't say no to such a concise request, yet as he gasped the handle, the hammer seemed to launched him into the air and smacked one of the rabbits in the back of the head, knocking it out,  before falling through the forest canopy.

With the giant rabbits searching in a different directions, we managed to recover our friend and get into a cave along the edge of the woods.

The cave seemed to be usually clean and we barely escaped with the knowledge of its occupant.  Again, we saw a light after a long walk by torchlight.  This time, the closer we got to the light the redder it's hue.  Near this apparent exit, our cleric Alwin noticed a broadsword floating in the middle of the tunnel, but we gasped in horror that it was floating in something and that something was moving towards us!

Murag dragged us into a natural alcove, then stole my dagger and hard tack and chucked them out into the middle of the tunnel.   This odd entity, filling the full portion of the tunnel, slogged its way toward the dagger and ration.  The hard tack dissolved in its gelatinous (is that a word?) consistency much faster than any of us during our rest breaks, and the dagger joined the sword and a scattering of coins.

We ultimately escaped the cave and emerged at the top of some green, luscious, rolling hills.... and obnoxiously PINK trees.

I was out of my element, but I knew we weren't in Weissmach anymore...

Yours in Service

Elsderth Greyhawk
Sage of the Order of Merit, Former Sellsword - Extraordinaire

GM Notes: Elsderth and the Order of Merit are still on the trail of one Talanth Blackash and his cohort of chaos, but WHERE that is might be the more important question.

We'll find out with next week's exciting conclusion...

Next: #22 Death March of the Tin Golems