Still thirty years after Episode #64....
The Azure Dream is set for a pleasure cruise.... Captain Ne'vets Aharo had a party cruise planned, raucous entertainment, music playing, with the only requirements was to maintain life support and keep the drinks flowing. Tarrie Prolek, former pilot extraordinaire, was hoping his Kessel Rum Bowls would do the trick for awhile. Quality was not as important as quantity.
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| The Azure Dreams, leaving Orocco. |
Evus, the Cruise Director/MC, inspected the reinforced refreshers, and planned some diverse party karaoke to test the waters with this bunch. Sid, child prodigy/security, had the slightest look of concern on her normally emotionless face.
As the ship passengers embarked upon the ship, they were met with a giant holo-vid projection of Evus welcoming them, pointing the direction of the cabins, then pointing back to the bar. It was amazing that premium holo-vid projector installed in the carcasses of two disabled R2 units they had stolen in a moment of blackout drunkenness only two night prior. It almost looked professional!
Standing behind the bar, just under the projected image of Evus' junk, was Tarrie, polishing glasses and triple-checking the chill level of the Kessel Rum.
Luckily the glass he was holding fell safely into the bar sink, as a member of the Oroccan Royal Family stepped onto the vessel. Tarrie quickly dried his hands, straightened his bolo tie, and waltzed over to greet this royalty, only to realize it was Jeffe, the idiot nephew to King Arcturo.
"I've taken dumps in smaller ships... and had them blown up!"
"Hold on, Jel Jeffe."
"Correct, use my title, ship peon."
"I understand this ship is smaller than your accustomed to, but let our hospitality makes things seem far grander than they are...." and with that Tarrie handed the nephew a neon red drink in the finest glassware available on the ship.
And with one sip, Jel Jeffe was content. "This is pretty good, I think the rest of the family will love this when they get on board."
Sid's ears perked up. She knew a party cruise was going to be tough to keep under control, but Ne'vets had not briefed them that the passengers were the royal family of them planet of their port of call.
The rest of the royal family filtered onto the ship, easily placated with booze and aggrandized demands for respect, for Sid, the biggest problem was that there were not enough rooms for the royal support staff.
To distract this logistical nightmare, Evus requested everyone back to the bar for a Bon Voyage Happy Hour back at the main bar. With the royal family and their entourage distracted, Sid could scurry throughout the ship for every spare cot, oversized crate, and collection of pillows to find some place for everyone.
Tarrie had two vats going behind the bar, one for the bright red Kessel Rum, and one for a blue and white swirling product to entice the fancier members of the family...
It was still Kessel Rum.
With the passengers placated, it was time for the Captain's grand entrance. He schmoozed the ladies, bowed to the lords, and made sure Uncle Niven's 17 cloaks were properly pressed.
Uncle Niven pulled him closer,
"I don't think my brother, the King, mentioned this to you, but it's our mother's birthday. Can you get a jubilee gala together for tomorrow night... and make it a surprise! She's turning 150!"
"150?!? We can make that happen for tomorrow... if you would please excuse me..."
And with that, he hastily strutted down over to a service door and flew down the stairs to the kitchen.
The droid kitchen staff were busily prepping for dinner that evening. Ne'vets hacked the touch screens and set all the preparations for the next night. He pushed the boundaries of system so far, that it was assumed that that action caused the food service equipment to never work properly after that cruise.
Evus slid behind the queen mother, Petunia, and waited on her hand and foot for just that evening.
Overnight, Ne'vets worked to the wee hours, training his galaxy-famous beaked server monkeys to perform a dance number and ensure that the surprise was kept.
Keeping the entire royal family placated (save the missing King, Queen, and young Princess.) Ne'vets and crew successfully pulled off the surprise birthday party for the Queen Mum. She was even appreciative and empathetic to their logistical problems in such a smaller star liner. But where, oh where, was her Romeo?
Romeo was the Queen Mum's Royal Lover. A young, strapping 20-year old, he had remained shirtless since he came aboard.
Assigning Sid for search and rescue, the Chief of Security found him in a Karaoke bar, choking on the microphone. Sid did what any good security would do, call for back-up, and very quickly Evus arrived, and removed the microphone from his throat.
Romeo properly recovered, it was time for Captain Ne'vets to say a few words.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, all gathered here. It is a glorious honor to have all of you here on our maiden voyage. Drink up, enjoy the night, we'll see you in the morning."
Luckily the masquerading Kessel Rum won everyone over before he even said a word.
The night ended with the Queen Mum, taking Ne'vets aside, squeezing his buttocks, and exclaiming, "Steven... this is very nice. And as a gesture... Romeo, go back to the state room and bring back the boxes."
Romeo ran off as commanded, and a few minutes later, returned carrying two large crates.
The Queen Mum continued, "I normally take these with me everywhere I go, but I feel your ship could get better use out of them."
Inside were dozens of tiles for a fabulous dancefloor. The next cruise would be even more exciting complete with a dancefloor with the royal seal of Orocco on it.
GM Notes: I picked up a Complicated Profession off of Kickstarter, possibly related to their zine-promotions. The concept of an adventuring party retiring for a new profession isn't new, but the process of shedding old abilities for new abilities better fit a for a cruise ship is an amazing transition.
There was a second encounter, involving a Cthulhu-esque character trying to eat the ship. Things felt much to rushed for the final half hour, so I'll omit it, but it did involve something straight out of Ant-Man, and too much a return to the old animal trading days.
And yes, a drunken Queen Mum read the Captain Ne'vets name badge backwards, an homage from the early episode.
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