Sunday, July 10, 2016

(Gnome Wars) The Ameri-bear Revolution / Seven Year's Picnic

Disclaimer:  As always, this is gnomish history is not the official history of the Gnome Wars campaign setting.  We here at Gaming with the Gnomies believe that however you wish to play with the gnomes is entirely up to you.   However, we also believe the options should be available for other races, products, etc to be added to the world at whatever level the players are comfortable with. Despite the Teddy Bears being out of production for some time now, they make a great foe/ally to the gnomes, so an explanation towards their existence is in order.  With bears appearing in the Seven Years Picnic (AWI), Pirate Bears, and Western Bears (The Good, the Bad, and the Cuddly), the appearance of a developed civilization in North America made sense, and helped with the divergent history from the United States, such as the The American War of 1836, where the Union broke away from the Southern Confederacy.  But I get ahead of myself... 

The initial Gnome settlers encountered the entirely uncivilized "Mohair-icans", a group of Teddy Bears completely cut off from the Teddy Bear tribes in the Gnomish lands.
For the some settlers, their first encounters didn't go exactly as planned. (Mike Lung)
The British gnomes used the colonies for their raw materials and any finished goods that were easy to transport.  The Bears that worked alongside this mercantile operation were rewarded handsomely for their cooperation.

Realizing such a large population of native forces, and a limited, but growing number of gnome settlers could be problematic, much less an expensive proposition, and a bouts of The Return hitting their merchants, the British decided to appoint Teddy Bear governors to each of the colonies.  Despite their status as second-class citizens, many of the early collaborators became prominent families in the governance of each colony.   And once they achieved their positions of wealth and power, these families would hold onto them with a fur-covered iron fist.

The merchants of Britain required certain quotas from each colony in return for self-governance.  For the industrious Bears, these numbers were easily met.  Unfortunately, the governors tended to send the amount of the quota back to Britain, and kept the vast amount of the profits for themselves.

With a weakening of British power in the region, many Scots, and French gnomes, plus some Irish Leprechauns fled to the New World and established colonies of their own from the power vacuum.  In some, they subjugated the Teddy Bears, with others the Bears were forced to flee.  At best, they were treated like 2nd class citizens, yet few complaints could be heard from these "civilized" non-British colonies.

With a joint Gnome/Teddy Bear pirate raid on the British stronghold of New Providence, evidence came to light of multiple governors skimming the top off the labors of their colonies.  A scathing article written in The Dirt Farmer's Almanac displayed this corruption in such simple ways that even the poorest Bear or Gnome could understand it.    The first fighting broke out in the New Ursine/Northern New Britain region where considerably Draconian governors had been operating.

The new technologies from the Gnomes elevated the fighting to desperate levels.  Usually most Bears ended up wounded in skirmishes and required some stitching to become able-bodied again.  With the implementation of improved pop-guns, cannons, and bayonets that were actually sharp, many combat injuries became fatal.

One of the early battles of the war, Rebel General Lexington vs. the 115th British Bear Brigade (Mike Lung)

Simple "Civilized" Bear living (Mike Lung)
Despite a strong economy in the North, the populist uprising swept over those who supported the "Hanobearian Crown."  Loyalist either escaped to Britain, or tried to start an anonymous life in the southern colonies.
British Bear Generals were just as cruel and demanding as their Overlords  (Mike Lung)

(Mike Lung)

The Hessians Were Known for Their Elaborate Christmas Celebration  (
The Blue Army of Revolt.  Note the rare Inuit Teddy Bear as a musician (Der Alte Fritz)
Lord Paddington's Pink Bear Army before a crushing defeat at "The First Teddy Bear Battle" (Der Alte Fritz)

Wargaming with Barks
With little aid from Britain or other Gnome powers, this internal campaign was fought over seven brutal years.   In the end, the armies of lower class Bears and Gnones solidfied power in the North and further threats to the Southern colonies led to a treaty amongst the Bears, shedding the yoke of oppression from the British and their Teddy Bear Overlords, and establishing a Confederation of Sovereign States (CSS), stretching between the New Scottish Isles and the proud mouse nations of Disneya.
A picture of a busy day in the heart of New York City (formerly Bear York City), where races of all type trump stereotypical conventions and live together peacefully.   (
While it took awhile for the Gnomes to recover (and longer for the British to regain Wanderlust and agree to sign the treaty,) for the Teddy Bears the horrors of modern war decimated their ranks.   Their desire to govern even a free country was soured by the carnage, and within a generation "American" Gnomes had completely seized the reigns of power of the CSS.  

If anything can be said about Teddy Bears, it is that they are one of the most adaptable races in the Gnome World.  Just as many adopted new ways with the arrival of the first gnomes, the average Bear willingly began working in fields and factories throughout the land.  Those who wanted a "freer" lifestyle travelled out west or sailed the High Seas as pirates, with and against like-thinking Gnome brethren.  

As every child knows, the CSS would not remain (intact) for long, but that is for another time. 

The Ambearican Colonies by Mike Lung
The so-called Ambearican Colonies had colloquial names used by Bears and the lesser races, and many of these stuck or were modified after the Revolution.:

Georgia Porgia– named after King Georgie Porgie I. The colony initial served as a place to send political dissidents. Many Highland gnomes were shipped here after ’45 and the defeat of Bonnie Prince Charlie Bear. Ironically, many of those same Highlander gnomes were fiercely loyal to the Hanobearian Crown.
South Carrotlina - homeland of many rabbit folk
North Carrotlina- homeland of many rabbit folk
Commonwealth of Ursinia– the Old Dominion…the first and richest Hanobearian colony
Bennsylvania – Named after “Gentle” Benn Wedloe. Wedloe made his reputation as the sheriff in charge of patrolling the Hannobearia coast apprehending pyrates and smugglers who infested the coastal wetlands. He was to have amassed a huge fortune from the sale of confiscated goods. His protection of the helpless marshland critters from abuse and enslavement of the evil pyrates made him a beloved Hannobearian folk hero and earned his “Gentle” nickname.
New Crapaud or New Jerbilly– Originally settled by French colonist who gave it’s name Neau Crapaud. Later the changed to New Crapaud when the colony was taken over by the Hannobearians. (or same story line only with Jerbils)
Bear York – Fun Fact:  New York City was originally a pig orc colony which the Teddy Bears avoided at all costs.  It was violently seized by the British/Hanobearians.
Cannuckdcat – The name comes from a local hero Cannuck d’ Cat. Cannuck was the son of a French Canadian cat who helped colonize this area. Cannuck was named after his father’s beloved home. Note: Although those of French background are often associated with their amphibian ancestry, the French are mixture of a number of different ethnic backgrounds. Cats are quite common. In fact, the French capital of Paris, was originally a cat tribal town, named Purris.  Just don't tell that to a French gnome, for they are known to go berserk.
Mousachusetts– Original Gnome founders of this colony also brought with them a number of religious dissidents who strove for relgious freedom.... and they happened to be mice.
Rodent Island– Home of a lot of smugglers and pyrats
New Hamstershire-  They ultimately removed their catchy slogan "Stuff Our Cheeks Till We Die" in 1825.  
And the
The Furmont or Verminmount Republic:  While associated with the Northern Colonies/States, this territory never fell under the sway of any Gnome influence.  Heavily populated by mice, turtles, and free-thinking Teddy Bears.  Government and Military will be discussed in detail in a future entry. 

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