(Gamma World) Not a Test #127 - Savory Finds

Our heroes, the De Facto Explorers, have decided to embark on an epic quest to reach Lathar's long-lost father, Harkonn.  After side-quests, distractions, and backtracking, the group has made it past Fair-Town and KIA Academy, and have encountered some sort of abandoned facility along the Big River.

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Lathar Bracken: A pure-strain human from River Bend.  He's got the muscle, the face, and a mount for most encounters.  Lathar's trusty beast of burden, No Name, travels wherever he does.   Looking for trouble in all the right places. The two-time champion of the Fair-Town Queen's Joust.  Recently married to the now-pregnant Thunnelda Haycock.   He had recently received a letter from his long-lost father, and has convinced the others to accompany him to the Wildlands.

Sneaky Pete: A mutated weasel scout.  Pete's telepathy and night vision take a backseat when he whips out his electrical powers.   Apparently addicted to his newly uncovered yellow powder found at "The Pool House"

Sonny Helianthus: an over 10' tall sentient sunflower artifact examiner with four arms, and trusted Restorationist ties. Knowledgeable,  but not a good one with device repairs or upgrades.   Sonny may have recently detonated an atomic device in the petrified woods... although no one else knows. 

Slitheran Wurmtail (aka Squiggles): a mutated earthworm scout, in impromptu power armor, looking for trouble in all the wrong places,  and finding it often.   He  has been subject to genetic testing and developed super-human strength, a more human body, and a thick coat of shaggy white hair.  Recently attacked and kidnapped then left for dead by an unknown group, looking for revenge.  Also pregnant for the third time, and due to deliver badly out of season

Poppy and Speedy: Two of Squiggles' offspring from his first... litter(?) They're now teenagers in worm years, old enough to grab diminutive muskets and help their Manchi and his friends on this epic quest. 

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Pete crept up towards the fence, revealing a larger complex along the river....

He ventured back to fetch the other explorers, still keeping everyone within a distance needing spyglasses and binoculars.  Pete wandered the perimeter.

Pete: "Guys, there's a lot of footprints in the dirt... I say we go around the wood line perimeter and explore those buildings.... "

Sonny: "By you guys, do you mean you?"  

Pete: "We can completely circumvent this and we can keep going down river."

Sonny: "I mean I think we're all a little curious." 

Squiggles: "Curiosity killed the cat."

Sonny: "Good thing none of us are cats..."

Pete started by reconnoitering the buildings outside the walled area.  At first look there was a three walled building, a huge unobstructed side which seemed to have deep and wide wheeled ruts leading all the way to the river.  The ruts seemed to stop ten feet from the rivers edge.  A quick look around the open area by Pete netted a windowless metal shack without windows and a single door up a short flight of steps, and a broken collection of metal framework behind the three walled structure.

Nothing worried Pete too much, except for the complete absence of bird or even insect noises. 

Pete gingerly returned to their spot, and the rest followed him back along the silent tree line.   The group itself was divided by whether investigating further or if the risk didn't match an obvious reward.  

It was Speedy the Worm who suggested, "If we didn't run into them on along the river yet, that means they must be downriver... maybe we can figure out who they are before they surprise us."

The group decided the young worms' wisdom of learning about potential enemies was worth the short-term risk.

Pete:  "If we hear weapons, or engines, we'll need to split quickly..."

Surprisingly, it was Sonny who noted certain symbols mounted to the outside of the wall... some of them had been deface.  No one had a clue what they were.  

They finally worked their way to the outbuildings and Sonny was particularly intrigued with the damaged metal framework.  Sonny worked his way away from the building, surmising from the half-broken dish and structure, that this had been some form of a communications array, that was intentionally cut precisely four foot above the concrete pad, and somehow knocked over. 

As a sunflower with four arms, Sonny took the dish as a potential shield.  

With back-up this time, they went to the windowless shack, propped the door open, and peeked in.  Along one wall was a long metal table with a number of tools and parts that appeared to be intentionally damaged/destroyed.  Pivoting from that spot, they found a surprise.

Two large racks of Ancients assault rifles, store neatly.  

The group went silent, trying to figure out why there were so many, why there was no ammo... discussions finally starting involving the logistics of carting them away.   Lathar grabbed one out of the rack, inspected it and slung it over his shoulder.  "I'm taking at least one... we just bought ammo back in KIA."

Pete:  "We don't know if these work... Until you fire a round..."

Lathar: "Let's lock and load..."

Sonny: "Here? Right now?"

Lathar: "If these folks get storming back after a single gunshot, we were going to be trouble anyway.   Speedy has spoken."

Lathar grabbed one of his magazine, it locked in easily, he put the rifle upon his shoulder, aiming across the river.

*click*

"I'm still taking mine!"

The group moved towards the half-opened gate....  They ventured towards the three small silo structures, clearly labelled: 

Water    

Rations 

Fuel

Lathar quickly rapped on the first silo.  Empty.

He moved to the second one, creating an odd sound.  "Something's in here."

Squiggle popped around the far side, holding a box.  "I think so!" 

There was a giant hole on that side, exposing boxes of "Rations Ready to Consume (RRC)" filling a third of the container. 

Lathar opened the box, revealing a dozen packages in a tough plas-tec covering.  He pulled one out, reading aloud the markings on it: 

CS LOGISTICS / RRC–M3 / HUMAN USE ONLY

• ☢ LOW RAD STABLE🧬
• MUTANT INCOMPATIBLE
• ⚠ NOT FOR PLANT ENTITIES

Squiggles: "Lathar, eat it!"

The others joined in.... "Lathar! Lathar! Lathar!"

Lathar pulled in tear strip on the pouch, revealing eight items inside.  He opened the rectangular slab labelled PROTEIN PROCESSED BRICK. Inside was a dense beige slab, faintly fibrous, with the physical appearance halfway between overcooked chicken and sidewalk chalk.  Tucked beside the slab was three connected packets labelled "“Savory,” “Smoke,” or “Neutral."   He got as far as ripping open "Savory" and applying the dark brown gelled substance onto the slab before stopping.  

"Who am I kidding, this might be the most dangerous thing here....  I'll try it later."

Discarding peer pressure for a moment, they moved around the closest domed buildings, labelled "MRF".  Each letter was the recipient of progressively more blood splatter, culminating in the most dried blood covering the building door.  

Pete spun the wheel in the center of the door to unlock it.  The room inside smelled stale but clean, with a number cloths hung up to provide privacy or partitioning.   Inside was another long metal table, with remains of a number of smashed tools and instruments, they did find three pistol like items, that weren't guns, but something was loaded into it.  

It was Posey the Worm who opened up a metal cabinet.  A strong smell emanated from it.  Inside were over a dozen glass containers with barcoded labels and various substances inside.

Speedy read the side of the cabinet in a halting manner.  "CS BIO-SEC FREEZER UNIT / LEVEL OMEGA"  

The samples are room temperature, some look like were rotting, save a plant based one, that had tendrils growing out of the sample. 

Pete: "Do any of them read 'Essence of Squiggles?'"

Next: #128 - 

Historicon 2027 Moves!..... Dates to July 21-25,2027

 A week after Historicon, the new snuck in like all the Post-Con After-Action Reports.  

Historicon 2027 is staying at the Lancaster Convention Center, but changing dates, at the request of the hotel/convention center.  It will now be July 21-25,2027. 

Let's just assume that something big (and more profitable) was rolling through the area that weekend, enough for HMGS to admit that they significantly incentivized financial to agree to the change.  

The theme for next year's con is "Small Battle and Big Impacts!" covering the battles that weren't epic or grandiose, but had great significance towards their conflict.  

Who's Stealing Historicon's Thunder? The Illuminati, of Course.... and They're Hungry

 I'm finally recovered from Historicon. I was powering pretty hard from Thurday, well into Sunday morning, closing bars, waking up early, working off little sleep, and only needing a 20-minute power nap one day to keep going.  Outside of my heels killing me each day (with special orthotics in them that usually work), I was cruising right along.    

Even with a fully licensed driver as my co-pilot, I drove home... the circuitous route, visiting my Mom in Easton, my daughter keeping Grandma company as I knocked out the yard work and some errands for her, before hoping in the car and getting back to my place by 3:30, so she could go home to Albany and meet up with friends for ice cream.  

It was about the time she was getting home that I sat on my couch with the a revelation ringing through my body:  

Hydrate. 

And I heeded my body's pleadings, including holding of on finishing my Historicon 2026 AAR.  I did finish it up early Monday morning for the masses to enjoy, but the time I got to work at 9am, I had a feeling I rarely had as a moderating youth. 

Probably the closest feeling to being hungover since January 1998.  Assuming it was not alcohol related, it might have been an odd con crud, or perhaps my body just couldn't handle a good time anymore. 

For 17 years, HMGS convention reports are usually a big draw, and if I made it to a Historicon, the write-ups still remain in the Top 5 of each year's posts. To be honest, if might be my only post in the quarter that cracks the top 25.  

Regardless, I came home after work on Monday, scarfed some grub, and edited the AAR post and promoted it.  

It's a positive response thus far, even saving most of the gnome pics to it's one separate post yesterday.  

As usual, I expect Historicon to shine in my weekly top 10 at the top spot for a week or three. 

It didn't get a day.  

Because my fear is coming true.  

I didn't mind the influx of bot posts.  I only slightly lamented me quickly accelerating through million mark posts like a hot knife through butter.  But those hits were at the landing/home page, not individual post usually.  

But this past week, Historicon was overshadowed by the Texas Roadhouse Massacre for Illuminati University (IOU) .  A few other random posts emerged from the rubble with a few dozen hits apiece.   Texas Roadhouse Massacre was getting direct hits in the thousands.  

I've got too many #RPGaDay2026 posts to write up, and too many new minis to paint, but I lament the private activity of watching posts grow (and die) naturally....

Historicon 2026 - The Gnome Games

Let's be honest, as much as I like doing the After Action Report for Historicon, and as much as I love the traffic it creates for the blog, I came to the con for one main purpose... 

The "Gnome King" himself, Jim Stanton and us fellow Stout Gnomes ran a total of eight games in the Commonwealth Foyer, a perfect view from the third floor escalator.  

Thursday 8pm - Treasure Island - "Have you ever considered piracy?"

After a relaxing Thursday, we kicked off our itinerary with Jim Stanton, rowboats and a scenically appealing volcano.  

Each of the gnome parties arrived in rowboats on the island and followed a very specific path their treasure map led the down.  

In the first few turns, they certainly knew they weren't alone.  Gnome Hawaiians would jump out the jungle.  In most cases the parties had enough firepower to eliminate them.  

Worse yet, the Blue Swiss quickly learned the Hawaiians were into rowboats as much as prisoners, because their unguarded rowboat was part of an deserted island crime spree.

Our prisoners. 

For most of the parties, it was getting the treasure, getting any prisoners, and getting the heck out of dodge.

Not for the Pirate player.  They navigated the jungle unmolested by natives, got the treasure to the rowboat.  The rowers headed back to the ship, unloaded their treasure, and returned to fight the other parties' rear guards protecting the rowboats.  

Unaware of the sheepish devilry occurring along the beach, the parties engaged natives inside the village.  One single gnome fired a single shot, and the world  descended upon them.   The village wasn't just a target, it was their only defense!  

Ultimately, they fought their way back the beaches, with the backdrop of an erupting volcano.  The Pirate player had absconded with four boats total, trading treasure or loyalty for survivor.  They were certainly the winning faction.

Friday 11am  - Treasure Island

Maja got to run the Friday morning session, same table, same set-up.  

Same basic treasure hunting and natives rule.   A science shack was now at the volcano, as well as rare Gnome Princess figured used to be the point of rescue for the British Marines.  

The native Hawaiians were a LOT more ruthless. sending snatch and grab raids when they in large numbers, focusing on the boat guards when spawning in smaller groups.  

Once shots were fired around the village during the prison break, an unaligned group of Cagnomibles and ZGnombies attacked everyone.  

There was a rally by the treasure hunter, forcing them to scurrying for ship.  Some of the groups that felt pre-destined to fail burned their boats. 

And somebody just had to knock on Dr Moreau's door....

Friday 3pm - Treasure Island - Surf-N-Turf - Raid on New Providence - The Gnome MEGA-GAME

Three tables. Tons of Gnomes.  Travelling across boards.

1) Treasure Island (Jim) - This is the first table expected to break the scenario, as they find the treasure, meet up with their ship and head back to their embassy on New Providence.  

It did speed up the game, but some diabolical rolls on the "Exploding Volcano" checks let the pirates showing up on the sea board first, followed by the others...  some with, some without treasures, choosing simple survival.  

2) Surf n Turf, the seas board.  I believe most players hadn't play a naval game before, much less Age of Sail, but the rules we used check the ship's afloat, although a few old-timers watching nearly had a heart attack when the the British Marine players pulled a Bootlegger Reverse with their frigate. 

As the Pirate Treasure Hunters crossed into the middle table, a horrible fault was uncovered.   We had assigned ships incorrectly!!! 

The Highlander player got a ship but had no objective outside of take damage and win by attrition!  As the Pirate NPC ship (now an active faction) nearly capsized trying to sail to recover their crews. 

And of course, the Hawaiians were in hot pursuit..... 

Fresh Outriggers from Diabolical Terrain.

After a few run-ins with the British ship, the Highlanders turned and fled... right into the chaos of New Providence!

New Providence (Mike) 

Between rival embassies and znombies, New Providence was jumping!

The German maintained and held a great embassy, which gave their players advantage in future games. 

Pure chaos! 

The question of the day was "Where is Mike?  Why is he only running one game?    We could admit that it was scheduling snafu, but he was also assisting with a group of AWI British re-enactors in the Vendor Hall, complete with his sweet uniform. 

Sorry ladies, he's married! 

Friday 8pm  - The Joust 

Run by Maja, roughly 24 players in a situation we haven't been in for many years of HMGS cons. 

We had company. 

After years of putting us in the middle of Distelfink, and pissing off the nearby GMs for being obnoxious, they usually give us an area with space.  

This year a very nice gentleman from New Jersey, running What a Tanker, set up his game, not suspecting that our rowdy gnome fans would be on the most raucous behavior for the first time in year! 

A special appearance by my friend (and old college roommate) Steve! 

We are gluttons for punishment every year, running a double elimination tournament with a weird number of participants with only poster tag and a Sharpie, but Maja performed beyond admirably. 

... even if her Dad kicked her butt in the loser's bracket.... and that's the story I'm sticking to. 

Our Historicon 2026 Joust Champion: Steven!

Saturday  11am   - The Ruins of New Providence

I intentionally left New Providence up for the morning game, and it did not disappoint! 

This was the first game where the full power of the playtest rules for Hawaiians would kick in.    

My only gripe is that there are too many figure types in the basic unit, and color-coding then is harder than it appears.   I definitely need to review the rules for the Pineapple Catapult and the Spirit Monkey critter.

My Favorite pic on the Hawaiians....

The German held their embassy, despite multiple waves of Hawaiians attacking.  

The Swiss player killed off the French guards protecting the telegraph station, causing the wires of reinforcements or cowardly retreat to the embassies for fall silent. 

Let's take a moment to praise our fellow Gnome Wars player Robert (BruegelBurg on the Gnome Wars Facebook group) snapped some awesome Swiss-centric pics of the game). 

BruegelBurg

BruegelBurg

BruegelBurg

BruegelBurg

BruegelBurg

BruegelBurg

Saturday 5pm  - The Raid on Providence - "Burn the Pirates" 

Jim ran the final game of the con with two focuses.  1) The Hawaiians needed to travel halfway across the boardgame to regain control of their lost artifact and 2) The Pirates leave their ship to deliver their gold to their warehouse.  

I turned around for five seconds and the pirate warehouse was already in flames.  Tough crowd indeed! 

We also had the premiere of custom Amphibious Canadian units. Cavalry on beavers and marines on otters.  More of those on a later post! 

(Painting) Tofer Miniatures Knight

The time around Historicon is either a flurry of painting for the con, or a long dry spell.

Unless, of course, I actually get some quality time at Hobby U and finish a figure.

Probably the newest entry in the free figures donated by miniatures companies, it was this knight from Tofer's Miniatures

A solid sculpt and a perfect excuse to use layers of different purple paints.

Mike Lung Gallery #97 - Gnome Horror

I'm a little amazed I didn't post these pics from friend-of-the-blog and AWARD WINNING GM, Mike Lung when we originally sent them to me.  

A Gnome Wars horror game (I'll bug him about system ASAP) with a lot of his own hand-sculpted gnomes.

(Gamma World) Not a Test #126 - Downriver Guardians

Our heroes, the De Facto Explorers, have decided to embark on an epic quest to reach Lathar's long-lost father, Harkonn.  After side-quests, distractions, and backtracking, the group made a multi-day stop at K.I.A. Academy.  With some important info obtained by questionable means, they must leave... quickly.

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Lathar Bracken: A pure-strain human from River Bend.  He's got the muscle, the face, and a mount for most encounters.  Lathar's trusty beast of burden, No Name, travels wherever he does.   Looking for trouble in all the right places. The two-time champion of the Fair-Town Queen's Joust.  Recently married to the now-pregnant Thunnelda Haycock.   Just received a letter from his long-lost father, and has convinced the others to accompany him to the Wildlands.

Sneaky Pete: A mutated weasel scout.  Pete's telepathy and night vision take a backseat when he whips out his electrical powers.   Apparently addicted to his newly uncovered yellow powder found at "The Pool House"

Sonny Helianthus: an over 10' tall sentient sunflower artifact examiner with four arms, and trusted Restorationist ties. Knowledgeable,  but not a good one with device repairs or upgrades.   Sonny may have recently detonated an atomic device in the petrified woods... although no one else knows. 

Slitheran Wurmtail (aka Squiggles): a mutated earthworm scout, in impromptu power armor, looking for trouble in all the wrong places,  and finding it often.   He  has been subject to genetic testing and developed super-human strength, a more human body, and a thick coat of shaggy white hair.  Recently attacked and kidnapped then left for dead by an unknown group, looking for revenge 

Poppy and Speedy: Two of Squiggles' offspring from his first... litter(?) They're now teenagers in worm years, old enough to grab diminutive muskets and help their Manchi and his friends on this epic quest. 

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Sonny Helianthus, 10-foot tall mutant sunflower, was always conspicuous by height, but this time he looked worried and anxious as he left the lobby and back to Level 0.  It took far longer to locate the rest of the Explorers, but each one was unquestionably on board as he told them each, "We need to leave." 

Despite a sense of paranoia, and plenty of looking over their shoulders, they emerged out of KIA without incident, and turned downriver on The Overpass.  Sonny still wouldn't divulged his reason for the group leaving.  

"The bridge... where we helped rescue the Kirothians... If that's safe, I'll tell you everything.

From the view of the long empty Overpass running parallel with the Big River, they got a better view of the great expanse inland beyond KIA.  The woodlands and rolling grasslands they had explore, the periphery of KIA's influence, the ruins of the Toard Jakey, the first  (and bad) encounter with the Kirothians.  Much of it was ruined, layered with new roads, trenchworks, and wire fences.  Hundreds of soldiers, the conscripted of the sub-levels and certainly regular above level folk, patrolled and trained in it's stead.  Like something had happened already.

Like they were preparing for something to happen again. 

Once they arrived at the bridge, the last shred of KIAs technology and influence, they rested.  Sonny provided the documents from Dr Kallex:  The test results of the syringe that was used on Squiggles, and full file the KIA had on Harkonn Bracken, Lathar's father.  

Lathar paged through the report, dropping to the ground, leaning up against the concrete wall of the bridge.  

"He didn't even care about me.... He didn't want to come back... Why are we even going?" 

The rest of the Explorers gave him space.  None of them had the emotional capacity to support their friend.  

After awhile, the wave of grief and sadness ebbing, Lathar stood up and brushed himself off.  

"He sent us a letter.... the raccoon handed it to my mother... That's what matters now.  Not what some file says.  KIA probably used him in Parr like they're using the people in the sub-levels as cannon fodder.  Let's go find him..."

The road below the last real KIA bridge varied wildly, from broken up asphalt to narrow single file trails through the woods.   No one was down this way, and the scouts were on their constant alert. 

It was Pete who caught a glimpse of them first, pulling up his binoculars to get a closer look:  

Two large figures, eight, maybe nine foot tall.  Black armor, red lights still glowing, even if they were motionless.  The woods in this area had been subjected to some large titanic fighting, with craters doting the landscape, and many of the trees stripped, or even partially exploded.

Still these two guardians, living metal or human armor, they did not know.  They stood firm.  

There was much concern as the Explorers held their ground.  Should Pete put a laser blast in one of their chests?  Would it even work?  What if it activated them?  Where would they run?  

It was finally decided to circumvent the pair, traversing away from the river, praying they didn't encounter anything wore, Pete or Squiggles on a vigilant guard behind to ensure they didn't come to life and follow them.  

Travelling a mile or two from the river, the woodlands were even more destroyed, and they started seeing portions of the armor... the broken pieces also had... human(?) remains in some, scattered around.  Sonny found a hand, incredibly heavy... unsure whether it was a gauntlet or living,  he took the piece with him.  

Along with the pieces, they stared finding human bodies, or the parts of bodies that had been in explosions.  They looked human, dressed like monks, in white robes, with varying blue decorative trim.  At some point, someone had positioned the bodies so all of their feet pointed upriver, and all had their left sides closest to the river.   No weapons, no items, no personal possessions could be found.  

Sometime during the third day, the trail was finally three men wide, with Pete leading from the front as the advance scout.  Around another river bend, the trail appeared to stop at a chain link fence, eight foot high, with a series of building.   Within... 

It appeared abandoned and empty.  

Of course, they needed to go check it out.  

Next: #127 - Savory Finds