Tuesday, May 31, 2022

(Kickstarter) Burrows & Badgers: The Streets of New Castle by Oathsworn Miniatures

 The good folks over at Oathsworn Miniatures have another 23 figures ready for their Burrows & Badgers line: The Streets of New Castle Kickstarter.

(Star Wars d6) #40- Zygerrians: The Musical!

The Current Crew of the Pretio
Ne'vets Aharo - an exotic animal broker, both legal and otherwise, majority owner in the Pretio.
Evus - Twi'lek free mercenary, Ne'vets' armed muscle with a keen eye and a tendency to shoot first.
Tarrie - Human pilot "under contract" to fly the Pretio, and drive the Piscopo.  Brother of potential terrorist, rebel  Latorna Savvn. His climbing skills are suspect, but his grenade skills make up for it.  Edging a dangerous lifestyle of drugs, booze, and loose women
Frokazza - Wookie co-pilot, mechanic, and unarmed muscle. Very distrustful, and that anxiety gives him skin issues.
Duk'k - Sipsk'ud Bounty Hunter, recently rescued by the crew.  Offering his services in order to get off this barely existing hunk of mud.  His warning shots are dead center mass kill shots. 

Off the Script...
Trying to recruit new clients for the business,
Exotic animal broker Ne'vets Aharo and the 
Crew of the Pretio have navigated their way 
Through the Imperial Zoological Symposium and Exposition
At the University of Alderaan.  

With Ne'vets late, and their pilot, Tarrie Prolack missing 
During a four-day binge of alchohol, sex, and drugs,
It is up to Twi'lek Merc Evus, the over-anxious Wookie, Frokazza, and 
Duk'k the Sipsk'ud Bounty Hunter to make a presentation to
A crowd of nerdy zoologists.

But something has just cause a comotion up in the catwalk on stage.  
This won't be a normal scientific presentation...

Frokazza the Wookie had tremendous hesitation for the crew's scientific presentation of the specimens of insects, spiders, and small lizards from Planet 576-908. His opening jokes weren't very funny, and few people appreciated them delivered in Wookie. Duk'k was delivering his lines too quick, and Evus had difficulty working the audio and visual controls.

Duk'k had his lines memorized, but kept thinking back what type of bounty hunting gig he would get after this disaster.

Ne'vets was amazed that 1,000 people had shown up for this neophyte presentation.  Standing right in the middle of the aisle, still ten rows back, he was still trying to find a way to avoid audience members milling about, and a scene with security, to gain access to the stage, and bail out the crew from most of their duties. 

When the lights went out, then came back with only the stage red lights, everyone feared the worst. 

They had no clue what the worst was to be. 

Descending from the catwalk at the back of the stage was Tarrie, at least the voice sounded like Tarrie.  

If is was the pilot, he was dressed in the costume from.... Zygerrians: The Musical??? Why the freedom-loving Alderaan Little Theater was covering a controversial musical about feline alien slavers was beyond the comprehension of most, but crew was more relieved that their friend was alive, and terrified of what he was going to do next.
Through his descent (and odd spoken word poetry slam opening number), a number of dancers, also dressed at Zygerrians, bound across the stage in choreographed glee. 

(It wold be discussed much later that Tarrie brought in the Alderaan Little Theatre company through a mixture of drug-induced coaxing, or with the threat of a blaster.  The performers maintained their level of amateur professionalism throughout. )

What got Tarrie in this situation?

It wasn't the first time that Tarrie had started with alcohol at a nearby university pub, fell into a sudden downward spiral with other, harder drugs.  It was the first time it had happened and fell into a group of amateur thespians.  Getting a tour of the theater itself, Tarrie fell in love with the costumes from the previous productions, and gave himself an invitation to take ones he liked when he progressed through the days he was missing. 

Somehow, between the hits of space narcotics that could kill a Gammorean, he never completely forgot about the big presentation, and figured out a better way to show off the lizards and insects.... with song!

Using Zygerrians: The Musical as his basis, he worked with a Ryn keyboard player in one of the brothels to help arrange the music and write lines that better fit zoological appreciation, with just a healthy hint of parody.   All the while, he kept telling anyone and everyone about the various tales of the getting Thingvellir's Translucent Trapper from the planet (Most of those stories made it into the second number.)

The most disturbing thing in a long list of disturbing things was the inappropriately hidden below the waist of his outfit.  If many children had showed up to the Zoological Symposium, or folks of rigid moral character, the exaggerated hip gyrations and choreography might be considered upsetting, or downright obscene.
Ne'vets managed to climb onto the stage simply ventured over the samples to protect them. 

Frokazza could only sway back and forth to the music.

Duk'k simply had his arm outstretched, like he was presenting the musical numbers.  He waited for his cue to continue the presentation.

Somehow, Tarrie had created four musical numbers that actually covered the presentation with some detail.  Despite the incredible effort, or the incredible dosage of pharmaceuticals, the musical numbers only reached the community theater standards the cast could at best achieve.

For the final number, Tarrie went into a frenetic final solo that obviously left the auditorium speechless.

Somewhere, Sulustrian Flan Fernando, the master of controversial musicals across the galaxy, was rolling in his grave.

Frokazza could only stand there stunned by his friends.  He was used to Tarrie's wild binges, but this was far worse than he had seen over the years. 

The audience was completely stunned, but thanks to some well-placed and enthusiastic clapping by Ne'vets, the audience gave a confused standing ovation.  After seeing the most athletic cast member play him, bedecked in a cool cape, he had to admit that it was unusual performance AND covered all the material required for the symposium.

After the applause, dozens of hands flew up for mandatory 15-minutes Q&A session.

Tarrie took the mic and continued a strong performance, but Duk'k noticed him fading fast.  He jumped in pushing the crashing Tarrie into Frokazza's arms.  Ne'vets soon took over from Duk'k and wrapped things up with spiel akin to the used speeder salesmen.  

With a final round of applause, the crew and the extras sashayed off, stage-right.  

"CAST PARTY!!!!" was all Tarrie could shout. 

Needless to say, the next presenter, covering the Dantoonie Shale Snail, had his work cut out for him.  

With bottles of spotchka flowing backstage, Tarrie finally got the crew up to speed, as he wavered. 

"You know, these theater guys are great, we could drink heartily with them and go our separate ways, OR we could steal whatever we want with these guys as a distraction.... just sayin'."

Ne'vets nodded, "I appreciate the enthusiasm, Tarrie.  Good job.  Let's get a nap before Kafla's big show."

The crew headed back to the hotel, to clean up, force Tarrie to eat and nap, and get ready for Kafla's evening presentation.  

While the others just wanted to vegetate, Tarrie was still ready for action. "I'm going to start my twelve steps... tomorrow.  Nawh, it'll be today, but I'm starting with with step five. SIX. SEVEN. EIGHT!"  and started to dance to the music in his head. "

Ne'vets locked the crew into the room, but walked down the hotel business center to check his messages.  Most of the messages were minor requests expected of a exotic animal broker (and notary), but he did pull up hold-vid of their presentation making the planetary news service.   

Before he finished and went back to his room, one odd message did appear, from a Dev "The Finger" Landrel.  He appreciated the theatrical presentation and wished for a meeting tomorrow afternoon to discuss some collaborations.

After a shower, a nap, and a meal, the crew dressed to the nines, they ventured down to the Alderaan arena for the 20,000+ interested in Kafla Thingvellir's presentation.  To see the marquees outside show "THINGVELLIR'S TRANSLUCENT TRAPPER" was a bit unsettling.  

They ventured to their seas, ten rows back on the floor from the circular stage. The stage had a circular curtain dropping from the rafters 100+ meters up.  Perusing the literature provided, they did see they were mentioned as part of the team that helped capture the Trapper.  

Kafla's presentation was incredibly motivating, funny, and surprisingly complimentary of the crew, calling Ne'vets out personally.  With the audience on the edge of their seats, Kafla pulled a giant lever to drop the curtain and reveal the trapper.   The curtain fell as intended, but it only revealed.... AN EMPTY CAGE!

GM Notes:  Alderaan Little Theater: They might seem amateurish now, but in a few years, they'll blow up big.

Monday, May 30, 2022

Another Month of New Gaming (June '22)

You can find the issue of Game Trade Magazine at your FLGS or online in pdf form here.  

Here's the list of cool stuff in this month's solicitations.

ViscountEric's Want List
Nothin'

ViscountEric's Money-Is-No-Object Want List
Renegade Game Studios
GI RPG - Hero Miniature Set #1 ....................... $55.00
After looking over the miniature options for the GI Joe Mission Critical game, trying to get just the figures, this is still a crazy $4.50 per figure for a boxed set, depending on the materials used. 
My Little Pony RPG Dice Set and Bag ............. $15.00
Here's hoping that Renegade (a division of Hasbro) is somehow absorbing the River Horse RPG.  Keeping polyhedral dice gives me a tiny bit of hope.

The Imaginary Store Order List (The Pegleg Gnome)
25th Century Games
Blazon ............................................ $40.00

Ares Games
Inferno RPG: Dante's Guide to Hell - Core Rulebook (5e) ................................. $49.00
Inferno RPG: Divina Comemedia Artbook ......................................................... $39.00
Inferno RPG: Inferno Guide's Screen .................................................................  $19.00
Inferno RPG: Virgilio's Untold Teales GM's Guide (5e) ..................................... $49.00
Orconomics ........................................ $39.90

BFF Games
Hidden Leaders .................................. $28.00

Bitewing Games
Hot Lead ............................................. $25.00
Pumafiosi ............................................ $25.00
Soda Smugglers .................................. $25.00

Bombyx 
Garden Nation .................................... $59.99

Burnt Island Games
Fall of the Mountain King .................. $59.00

Chaosium
Runequest RPG: Weapons and Equipment .........................  $34.99

Compass Games
Death in the Trenches ........................ $79.00
Granada: Last Stand of the Moors ....  $99.00
Paper Wars #101 ................................ $51.95
Test of Faith: The Arab-Israeli War of 1973 ........... $109.00
The Third World War: Designer Signature Edition ..... $199.00
No this isn't inflation run rampant, these are the costs of a traditional board and chit wargames.  Hours of entertainment doesn't even scratch the surface for those who love to play these games.

Funko
The Goonies: Never Say Die ................... $34.99
The Goonies: Under the Goondocks Expansion ...... $14.99

Grim Rabbit
Red Flags: Core Game .............................. $25.00

Guilt-Free Gaming
Long Live the King .................................. $25.00

Japanime Games
Big Eyes, Small Mouth RPG 4th Editon GM Screen

Keymaster Games
Parks: Wildlife Expansion ......................... $19.99

Kobold Press
Book of Ebon Tides (5e) ............................ $49.99
Book of Ebon Tides Polyhedral Dice Set... $19.99
Tales from the Shadows HC (5e) ............... $39.99

Konami Digital Entertainment
Yu-Gi-Oh! Power of the Elements Boosters

Modiphius
Star Treks Adventures RPG: Kirk's Tunic Dice ................... $19.99
Star Treks Adventures RPG: Rules Digest ........................... $34.99

Monte Cook Games
Path of the Planebreaker (5e) ............................................... $54.99

North Star Games
Paint the Roses ................................................... $39.99
Paint the Roses: Escape the Castle Expansion ... $29.99

Osprey Publishing
Frostgrave: Fireheart ........................................... $30.00
Lion Rampart, 2nd Edition ................................. $30.00
Village Rails ........................................................ $28.00

Paizo Publishing
Pathfinder: AP Blood Lords Part 2 - Graveclaw .................... $26.99
Pathfinder: Book of the Dead Battle Cards ............................ $34.99
Pathfinder: Flip Tiles Villain Lair Set .................................... $39.99
Pathfinder: Lost Omens Character Guide HC Special Edition ................. $59.99
Pathfinder: Lost Omens Travel Guide HC ............................ $39.99
Starfinder: AP Drift Crashers 2 - Nightmare Scenario .......... $24.99
Starfinder: Armory HC (Pocket Edition) ............................... $24.99

Ravensburger
Star Wars Villainous: Power of the Dark Side ......................... $26.00

Renegade Game Studio
Hunter the Reckoning 5th Edition Dice Set ........................... $20.00
Hunter the Reckoning 5th Edition Character Journal ............ $21.99
GI Joe RPG Character Journal ............................................... $21.99
Power Rangers Character Journal .......................................... $21.99

Smirk & Dagger
Boop ........................... $39.99

Steve Jackson Games
Munchkin: Munchkin Turtle Carnage............ $10.95
Pick a Card Dice ................... $9.95
If Steve Jackson is going to finance all the smaller projects with Munchkin and overpriced random dice, I guess I'm all for it.

Wargames Atlantic
Bulldogs ................................. ....................... $34.95
Goth Warrriors ................................................ $34.95
25mm Dual Use Bases .................................... $15.00
Horses ............................................................. $34.95
Boxers ............................................................. $34.95

Wizards of the Coast
D&D: Journeys Through the Radiant Citadel HC ......................... $49.95
With the usual alternate cover at the same MSRP

Magic the Gathering: Double Masters 2022

Wizkids
D&D Demilich Unlife-Sized Replica........................... PI
D&D Icons of the Realms - Elder Elemental - Phoenix ............PI
D&D Icons of the Realms - Strixhaven ......................... $49.99 each
Set 1 & 2 available
D&D Nolzur's Marvelous Miniatures: Adult Green Dragon ..... $89.99
D&D Nolzur's Marvelous Miniatures: Wave 18.............. $4.99 - $14.99
This wave includes human clerics in wheelchairs, the first such characters that I've remembered seeing in solicitations.  
D&D: Teeth of Dahlver-Nar Bite Sized Artifact ....................... $79.99
D&D Three Dragon Ante- Giants War Expansion .................... $24.99
Star Trek: Attack Wing: Federation Faction Pack - Ships of the Line ................. $39.99
Star Trek: Attack Wing: Romulan Faction Pack - Secrets of the Tal Shiar ......... $39.99
Wizkids Deep Cuts Wave 18................................................. $4.99-14.99
Giant Spider, Rowboat and Oars, Skeletons (2), Zombies (2)







Sunday, May 29, 2022

(Kickstarter) The City Guard of Midlam by Midlam Miniatures

Like clockwork, another Midlam Miniatures Kickstarter has launched, the apropos City Guard of Midlam

Everyone of there 31 previous Kickstarters are simply fantastic (ok,ok, the Beekeeper Cult one was kinda weird, but well-done).  This might be the best core city guard/town militia that I've seen in quite some time.   So much so that I'm tempted to brazenly ignore my UK Kickstarter moratorium.  Even compared to the Die Hard Minis Kickstarter this week, roughly $38 for nine figures (plus shipping) for the city guard versus roughly $38 for five figures (no shipping) for a Die Hard gang.  

First world problems, I guess.


(Kickstarter) Law and Disorder 2 from Die Hard Miniatures

 Die Hard Miniatures has launched Law and Disorder 2 to expand their sci-fi lines.

While I adore their bounty hunter figures, and I can't argue with sculpts by Tim Prow and Kev White, I'm still trying to adhere to my moratorium on UK orders, thanks to shipping costs and expenses.  I also initially flinched at the £30 ($38) for five figures, but with stretch goals alternating between new units and free figures, I may need to bite the bullet 

Those bounty hunters look... familiar.
(Edit:  When Tim Prow responds to my post, I'm happy to edit the post. To clarify, the £30 pledge level for one squad includes any free minis released through stretch goals.  As Tim mentioned in his comment, if all stretch goals are achieved, it's an £87 value!  Each individual squad is available as an £18 add-on per unit... no freebies, but before shipping.  This also a great excuse to recommend visiting Die Hard's website, to see their existing range of sci-fi and fantasy figures.)


Saturday, May 28, 2022

(Kickstarter) Pulp Cthulhu 2 from Brigade Games

 After two years, Brigade Games has finally launched a Kickstarter for Wave 2 of Cthulhu and Pulp Miniatures. 


Full disclosure here:  These figures are absolutely fantastic, and the ability to mix and match each set to suit your needs is great, but I still haven't even based my figures from Wave 1.  I'll eat these word, as I realized I pledged for the Adventurer's Early Bird in Wave 1 and some of the figures are ones that we're probably going to need for Season 4 of the Pulp Game. 


Friday, May 27, 2022

(Painting) Macho Women with Guns! Americ-Ann and MechNasty

A minor disaster occurred as I finally spent some quality time on the painting bench.  The fluorescents in my workbench lights decided to collectively die.  Without spares, I'm forced to use a single pair (out of 12) and my LED lamps I regularly use.  Painting in the dark might be better for me, anyway.

This week's results are two figures from the terribly fun and non-PC Macho Women with Guns miniature line for the RPG of the same name.  
I've shown a painted Americ-Ann from off the internet over two years ago, when I brought up the line.  Try as I wanted to, the red and white stripes on the sleeves and stockings aren't bad to paint, they just don't look good, so I kept them white.   Otherwise, it's a nice figure to paint.
Americ-Ann MWW-007
I don't own a copy of the game anymore, so I don't immediately get the full inside joke on MechNasty, but it's a completely service robot/droid/power armor figure perfect for my games.    

MechNasty MWW-106
Two more figures finished and into the generic sci-fi case, although I bet five bucks as the girls select figures for their Pulp Alley leagues, somebody's picking Americ-Ann.

Otherwise, an update on Season 4 of Pulp Game.  The main adversary for the premiere episode is finally based (I swear Warlord put bases in their unit boxes, perhaps I'm just hallucinating, or misplacing bases), primed some paint slathered on them, en masse.  To avoid my normal yelling, I'm painting the interior of the figures before adding the missing left arms.
The large and miscellaneous projects tray, from within the shadows of my basement.

PROJECT: 350 -  Two weeks ago we finally went under 450 posts, today, we're back over it, but our  ideas/drafts have dropped to under 300!  The blog is at  451 (297/154) up from 448 (300/148) I've stretched out a few posts them seem to collectively needed to be posted this week, the non-basketball weekends allowed me to drill Star Wars Actual Plays to only five left to be written.

Thursday, May 26, 2022

(Georic Gazetteer) Kingdom of Markovia, Circa 1150

The Kingdom of Markovia
Pantheon: Norse, with pockets of Akana and Guya
Ruler:  King Robert von Manhoffen III
Capital:  Manhoffen (40,000)
Other Cities: Dunzig, Greenleaf, Ironkeep, Rapleye, Suscana
Language: Prythax, Dwarven
Flag/Emblem:  A quartered flag of black and white, the black with golden lions in the black.

Coinage:  Prythax standard
Important Personas: The Archbishop of Manhoffen, the only recognized Akana clergy, Grandus Hammerkith of Ironkeep, many minor nobles, merchants, and guild masters of the mining guilds.
Alliances:  Five Kingdoms (trade), Western Wyrmnal (trade)
Hostilities: Ras-Prythax
Open Warfare/Skirmishing: Open warfare with Agenmoor Drow
Intrigues:   King Robert is terminally ill with no legal heirs to the throne, and six potential claimants are forming factions.  Robert supports Count Arnulf of Petriyye, Duke Baldwin of Sodrad, Duke John of Peastan, Lord Thierry of Drenthe, Guilllame of Astana, and even a claim for the Dwarven Lord Grandus Kammerkith.  Each of the mining guilds (Afgrund Mines and Grand Metallic Mining Consortium) are trying to influence the selection as well.  Little do most know that Minster of War Amos Timorssen has the support of the military and seeks to overthrown Robert before he passes.  
Demi-Humans: Dwarves, Gnomes, scattered groups of elves and half-elves.  Drow sneaking across the border from the south to wreck havoc. Orc tribes still control a number of mountain valleys that have not been civilized.
Magickal Devices: Flying Tower, Dreamspider Loom, and Lens of the Savants
Mountains:  The entire country is a tall mountain range.   The range drops precipitously into the Starfall/Mer Nor, with a minimum drop of 500 feet.  
Thumbnail Sketch:  Markovia holds the distinction that, like Agenmoor was once all forest, almost the entire country sits in the Markovian mountain range.  With Agenmoor to the south, Crosedes to the west, Ras-Prythax east, and the Mer Nor above, Markovia was known as the only guaranteed safe passage across the continent, that is, before the rebellion.

The mountains jut out of the Starfall Chanel and MerNor water at 500 feet high.  Unlike the fjords of Zieland and Wyrmnal, there are just about no safe spots for a settlement.  The only significant port is Dunzig, which has developed a legitimate harbor since the Kingdom was established. 

In 1045, Markovia was a Gran Duchy within the patchwork quilt of Ras-Prythax.  The death of Gran Duke Jacob Von Manhoffen was under mysterious circumstances, and the subsequent death of the Crown Prince, Hartwig, brought deep concerns that Ras-Prtyhax troops had been dispatched to delay the coronation of Jacob's sister, Gretchen.  Those troops were recalled before ever reaching the capital, due to the death of Krugraf Arnulf.  This power vacuum still forced Gretchen to delay her coronation, but when it did occur, she and her husband Edmund, were named Queen and King of Markovia, splitting away from the flimsy empire.  

Dwarves and humans work together to profit from the numerous mines within the mountains, yielding coal, iron, precious gems, and a host of other resources. They operated through city and regional guilds, which hold considerable influence throughout the countryside.

The demi-humans have assisted the Markovians with an ingenious water solution.  Dozens of windmills not the mountain ranges, operating pumps with draw water for the higher-altitude communities from freshwater lakes below.  It is quite the feat of engineering!

All the dwarves in Markovia have emigrated from Ras-Prythax over generations.  Ras-Prythax wanted to apply higher taxes, and the then-Gran Duke refused outright to collect any additional taxes.  According the Ras-Prythax legend, the dwarves "vanished" when in reality, they packed up, travelled underground to Markovian territory, and sealed up the passageways behind them. 

The Dwarven City of Ironkeep

Religion: After Gretchen's installation as Queen, there was an establishment of Nordic temples, churches, and shrines, most devoted to Wo-Tan and Freya, although the other gods of the pantheon have been known to have their devoted make an appearance. Akana is not the state religion, although many still practice, and all levels of government acknowledge the power and privilege of the 


Geography of Note:   Numerous rivers flow out of Markovia, but only the VerWillip flows into the country.  It flows in from Verbobonc in Ras-Prythax, runs parallel with the Mer Nor Road, and empties just east of Dunzig.   The Grimsong Clan is the largest clan of orcs still living in the Kingdom
  • The Jagged Crevasse of Greenfalls

Mentions of Markovia in the Blog:

NotesMarkovia fills in for Holland and most of Belgium on my Epic of Aearth map, except that it is truly mountainous terrain. Just take the traditional lowlands and make them more like the Alps.  Where the mountains meet the sea, imagine the Cliffs except instead of white and 350 foot tall, they are brown, rocky and 500 feet tall at a minimum, and climb much much higher into the mountains.  It (was) the safest way to travel from Ras-Prythax to Crosedes without dealing with the vile elves of Agenmoor, the deranged mages of Emron, or the machinations of the mad dwarf king in the center.

Tuesday, May 24, 2022

(Star Wars d6) #39 - The Imperial Zoological Symposium and Exposition

  The Current Crew of the Pretio

Ne'vets Aharo - an exotic animal broker, both legal and otherwise, majority owner in the Pretio.
Evus - Twi'lek free mercenary, Ne'vets' armed muscle with a keen eye and a tendency to shoot first.
Tarrie - Human pilot "under contract" to fly the Pretio, and drive the Piscopo.  Brother of potential terrorist, rebel  Latorna Savvn. His climbing skills are suspect, but his grenade skills make up for it.  Edging a dangerous lifestyle of drugs, booze, and loose women
Frokazza - Wookie co-pilot, mechanic, and unarmed muscle. Very distrustful, and that anxiety gives him skin issues.
Duk'k - Sipsk'ud Bounty Hunter, recently rescued by the crew.  Offering his services in order to get off this barely existing hunk of mud.  His warning shots are dead center mass kill shots.
Kafla Thingvellir - Billionaire entrepreneur turned zoological enthusiast, "discoverer"  of the Translucent Chromatic Trapper. Recently released the party from his service and is prepping his presentation of the Trapper at the Imperial Zoological Symposium and Exposition on Alderaan

Bailing on the Group Project
With the Billionaire Kafla Thingvellir only focused
On his presentation of the Translucent Trapper, 
It has allowed the crew of the Pretio
To create their own impromptu presentation
At the Imperial Zoological Symposium and Exposition, 
of all of the other creatures 
they had cataloged on the planet.

But tragedy seems imminent, as 
Exotic Animal expert and group leader, 
Ne'vets Aharo, has gone missing, and 
Their charismatic pilot, Tarrie Prolek, 
Has disappeared entirely after a drunken bender

Can Evus, the Twi'lek Merc, Frokazza the Wookie, and
Duk'k the Bounty Hunter keep their booth and presentation 
Together in order to gain legitimacy and 
Hopefully new clients?


Alderaan University

When everyone agreed to make their own presentation at the Symposium, no one expected the doors about to open to the Exhibition with only Evus, Duk'k and Frokazza manning the exhibit.  Even if they could make it through today, there was another morning manning the exhibit, followed but a full blown informational session that afternoon.  

Crowds were bearably light in their sector of the hall. 

"Is this some sort of a sick joke?"

Duk'k corrected the person, "Actually, they're a lot of dead bugs."

"I see that, is this some sort of fraternity prank?"

"No sir, we're part of the team that collected these.  You need some sort of team to collect dead bugs and animals, we're your guys."

The conversation did not go much further, which set the tone for the next two hours of attendees more impressed with the "Booth Dudes" than the material presented.  

During a lull, Duk'k stared across the aisle.  Between the Space Ferret Farm and a generic display on planet based animals, there was a narrow passage leading right to the 30-foot high glass windows surrounding the complex.  The beam of sunlight coming through was comforting to the Sipsk'ud, but he was even more impressed with Ne'vets on the other side, desperately pounding on the sound-proof glass.

Duk'k waved at him.

Ne'vets frantically motioned for one of them to come to the nearby door.   Frokazza was nudged to meet the bossman.  

While Frokazza ducked out of the side door, Ne'vets kept his distance, a good five meters or so away from the door..  A quick scan of area revealed a potential reason.  Numerous Univeristy Security officers were well-placed some distance away.  They responded to every one of Ne'vets' steps.

"Frokazza, I'm going to need you guys to sell, talk up the bugs.  Hopefully we can arrange a contract with someone. "

The Wookie acknowledged their mission.

"I'll be gone for a couple of days to handle a legal matter.  Don't worry, everything's okay."

"Four days???"

"I said a couple days..."

"Oh, ok, we can do that, " and with that, the Wookie returned to the team.   He relayed the message to the team.  

Duk'k, "Is it concerning that the bossman will be missing for four days and our pilot is nowhere to be seen?"

Frokazza, "I trust Ne'vets, but Tarrie I worry about."

Meanwhile, Ne'vets left campus and the watching eye of the security.  He travelled into Alderaan City to find the baddest, toughest barrister to help him with his "problem," That was Hustar Glirnammo, and she was more than happy to take the case.  It was only a university on-campus matter, piece of cake to resolve.

Back at their exhibition, the trio braved their way through all the hordes of zoological geeks, dweebs, and weirdos.

A Rodian wearing a twead jacket with elbow pads walked up to the Wookie, and asked a familiar refrain,  "What's up with this?"

"The capture and caught this, and this is what we do. We get these for our clients."

"Are you leader"

"No!"

"Well who is the leader"

"Ne'vets Aharo."

"Dammit, I now owe my associates some money on a bet.  Ne'vets didn't describe his crew, but you fellows stick out like a sore thumb."

Professor Skeez A'zizeek was a Professor of Mollusk at Alderaan University, and one of Ne'vets' Sabaac playing collegues for the past few evenings.  

"That's a LOT of exotic bugs!!!" the Professor exclaimed.  "I understand you guys normally look for tigers and kriff, I think the university can take these dead lizards and bugs for a thousand credits."

Duk'k  interjected in the conversations, "Sound like a thousand credits IS the least you can offer....Bub!"

The Rodian became flustered, "How dare you!!!!.... why... that's why Ne'vets will stay the rest of his life in an Alderaanean jail.  Plus the bastard stole my watch., even if it was fair and square!"

Woman's voice cut through the tension in the air, "A'zizeek, why are you bothering this poor Wookie...."

An orange Twi'lek female with short lekku immediately took the professor aside and after a quick volley of bickering, the Rodian stormed off.

"Interesting, that is a lot of bugs... big strapping men.  You are collecting very small animals, why is that.  Oh, yes, my apologies, Dr Lyntel'luroon"

I'm Duk'k, sister!
"Very nice to meet you Duck Sister.  I happened to be on Alderaan and haven't been to one of these since grad school.  Still as boring as it was before, except when I can harangue some under-qualified professors who barely graduated university."

After humoring the trio by listening their entire presentation, Lyntel made an inquiry:

"Do your have someone who speaks, how you say, Academics?"

The three looked at each other quizzically "No...."

"You need to, this would be a great presentation if you did.  Good luck, gentlemen."

Ne'vets didn't get back from his legal matter until after the Exposition closed for the night.  He found his crew in the hotel cantina, toasting to their scholarly survival of the first day.  

Evus and company recapped the snooty academics, the lowball offer for the display, some dude was looking for his watch, and a rough-and-tumble Twi'lek woman who claimed she wasn't a stranger to exhibitionism.

Ne'vets was agitated at their lack of networking, even more so that they couldn't get a better offer, "That collection is worth 10k minimum!  Maybe as low as 8,000 credits, if we can make some connections through the buyer."

After drinks and dinner, it was decided that it was as good a time as any to find Tarrie.  He was supposed to me the second speaker with their presentation tomorrow afternoon.

The crew wandered over the stretch of various bars and cantinas Tarrie was last seen in.  Between Frokazza's force and Duk'k's skills, they ascertained that he was still frequenting the bars, "dressed like a Jedi Knight", and then "dressed like a Lazerball player." or even "dressed to the nines... and covered in glitter."  Further questioning by Ne'vets brought out everyone's worst fears:  He had advanced from booze to the harder drugs. 

Frokazza decided to advance to the brothels and even seedier parts of Alderaan City.  Thanks to the pacifist utopia of the planet, the sex industry was fully regulated and quite cooperative regarding their missing friend.  They got confirmation from numerous establishments that he frequented almost all of them on a nightly basis, usually dressed in extravagant costumes, "Like he robbed the costume rack at the local theatre."

They also confirmed the various drug use, "I was more worried  the "Missle Man's" heart would explode in the middle of telling one of his crazy stories."

The crew got directions to the local community theatre, just on hunch, and ventured out in the middle of the night.  The theatre was bedecked with posters promoting their next production: Zygerrians: The Musical, but no one was there.    Duk'k decided to call the contact information under the poster.  The connection picked up, "Kriffing Frack, Alderaan Little Theatre, Tiberius speaking.  Are you interested in tickets for Zygerrians: The Musical?"

A very pissed off Tiberius confirmed the the theatre possessed glitter covered suits and bedazzled Lazerball uniforms, and outside of a possible choreographer position, there were no other leads.

They worked their way back through the bars and brothels, paying off a few staff to have them contact them if Tarrie appeared.

Walking into the hotel in the early morning, the front desk hailed them down.  They had a package delivered to them.  Inside were fiver tickets Kafla's big presentation at the Lazerball Arena that evening, tenth row on the floor.  

The group picked up some quick sleep, and as the others grabbed breakfast, Duk'k spent his morning binge watching old zoological presentations on holovid so he could get a grasp of the format.  

While the trio went back to the convention hall to pick up certain displays, and review that afternoon's presentation, Ne'vets left alone again.  His destination:  the University administration building for a hearing.  His barrister, Hustar Glirnammo was there and ripped apart the proceedings.  

It appeared that Ne'vets may have gotten too friendly with various faculty members during a series of nightly Sabaac games, and instead of making valuable academic leads to help with his exotic animal business, allegedly robbed them bind gambling, and allegedly robbed them blind for anything else that they had left.  The faculty complaints of theft brought about a ban from all buildings on campus, but a scathing rebuttal by Hustar cleared him of any wrongdoing, and granted him full visitor access throughout the campus.  

Thank was a good thing, because by the time the hearing was over, he only had ten minutes to make it to the small auditorium the crew was presenting in. 

At the auditorium, the trio were properly freaking out.  The various A/V equipment wasn't cooperating.   Frokazza hairy hands were simply too big for the remote, and the wrong button-pressings were changing the settings, specifically the holo-presentation.  

Ne'vets could not get access into the building without the buying the ticket and needed to push his way through the stage to reach his crew.  

The facility on a tight schedule, the lights dropped and two spotlights hit Frokazza and Duk'k respectively.  Before Duk'k could turn his mic on, the Wookie tried to tell some jokes that no one could understand.   Once his mic went live, Duk'k went into a stale intro covering the logistical difficulties of bug collection.  

Just as even Evus was feeling the presentation could not get worse.  The lights went out.

Red lights came up on the stage, and other effects kicked in.

"When did we pay for a smoke machine," Duk'k whispered on a hot mic.

A voice echoed through the auditorium's PA system, "Yes, there are many fabulous things on this planet as well..."

Above the stage, hanging from one of the catwalks, was a man dressed a Zygerrian.

A voice came over the crew's coms.  

"Guys.... I got this.  Follow my lead."
Tarrie: Dressed as Tera'gan from Zygerrians: The Musical

GM Notes:  We tend to use the term "Space _____"  as a lazy way to describe something in-game.  I think I'm at fault for not thinking fast enough at the theatre when describing their next production and named it "Space CATS."   I've only renamed the production Zygerrians to represent a feline race of humanoids in Star Wars.  May God have mercy on our souls.

Monday, May 23, 2022

Optional AAU Rant Rankings #5

 With no basketball again this weekend, and one kid at a sleepover Saturday night, and both at a pool party, Sunday, it was a relaxing weekend.   Sure, I only got about an hour on the painting bench, but I decided to brave the heat wave to open the pool for the kids.  Most of the weekend was spent enjoying the new air conditioner for my office, and churning out THREE Star Wars d6 Actual Plays.  

It also allowed to do data entry on my two AAU Girls age groups I follow with tournaments in six states affecting the Power Index I maintain.  

A lot of inactivity actually allowed some teams index number to rise (some teams finally have a shot to win two or more games in a weekend, hence their winning percentage goes up, influencing the index numbers.)  Worse yet, some teams won their respective tournaments, but against a poor schedule, the index penalized them with a 20-30 point drop.

You'll also note the undefeated #15 team from last week dropped out of the standing altogether.  Another tournament championship for them this weekend, but their level of competition is repetitive and inferior.   Treat this as a mid-major college team, or a team that's only played DIII schools as a warm-up.  Some of these teams never leave their local comfort zone.  

They're also all in 5th grade. 

Many in the 7th grade Division partook in a giant three-day tournament in Atlantic City, New Jersey this weekend.  Fifty (50) teams participated, of which at 45 would be considered "quality" competition that teams would want to travel 3+ hours to play against.   All those teams did beat up each other, so the indices will all go down... unless you win out.

The nine game minimum moves up to ten for next week.  I'm assuming most programs should have five tournaments for a season (March-June), so is 15 the baseline for the end of the season?

Thursday, May 19, 2022

(Kickstarter) Warzone Eternal by Res Nova

EDIT:  Less than two weeks into the campaign, Res Nova cancelled the Kickstarter. citing low enthusiasm from the Warzone community, and less than stellar funding.  They had already reached the Kickstarter goal, but things went silent right afterwards.  More to come, I assume.

Warzone is a game the just won't seem to die, so it makes sense that Res Nova Games has called the new iteration Warzone Eternal now available on Kickstarter. 

Gone are the racks and racks of minis I remember well, as things are streamlined down to a skirmish game.  

The original five megacorporations are still there - Bauhaus, Capitol, Cybertronic, Imperial, and Mishima, but initial pledges for Unit boxes that will allow you enough pieces to build a five-man unit out based on 6-8 different options (medics/leaders, Blood Berets and Golden Lions for Imperial, as an example). 




The Dark Legion (Algeroth) is still around, although figures for them are available as 6 Undead Legionaires, a pick and choose for Necromutants and Centurions (out of 3 options), or just one giant Razide... all at the same rate. 

In a world where prices are spiraling out of control, $25 for the pdf and hard copy of the rules feels like a steal, but I'm still wrapping my head around $40 for five base figures, no matter how many companies have adopted this structure over the last ten years.   It might just be the me getting old, or me having a shoebox full of unopened Warzone blisters hiding in my basement. 



Wednesday, May 18, 2022

Mandatory AAU Basketball Rant: Tournament #3

 With the word rant in the regular title, it would be foolish to avoid my topic for the day.

The easiest job in the world?  AAU scoreboard operator.  

Referees are usually horrible, but given most tournaments will give 11 assignments in a 12 hour stretch, I'm satisfied that they still make most calls and at least try to enforce player safety.  

I've never refed an official game, but I have done scoreboard and stats for a variety of levels.  I've had clock issues and minor, short-term scoring issues, so I try to be sympathetic, but I've seen egregious scoring errors in 12 of the 14 games I watched last weekend.  Multiple three-pointers (with both refs using the "touchdown" motion to signify this) were each marked as two points apiece.   Phantom foul shots added or ignored.  And even worse, complete ignorance on running clock rules.    

Let's not even talk about the one time an assistant scorekeeper was assigned to championship, only to have them pass out, face down, on the table before tip-off. 

If my kids' teams need to go back to 8am starts to resolve this, I'd be willing.  Late games this weekend were neither better nor worse.

While I'm a big fan of early tip-offs, discovering on Thursday that both girls had their games start after dinner on Saturday threw off all our pre-planning.  Dogs were still going to the kennel Friday afternoon and hotel rooms everywhere were set-up with use-it-or lose it reservations (those who tried to cancel Friday only had their whole weekend wiped out.)  

The big benefit was that we got a chance to go down, find the (new) hotel by dusk, and simply relax with a late wake-up.  

The odd displays of broccoli around doors was a bit disturbing.  

With a late wake-up, but a late game, we packed the car full of girls to make a visit up to Chocolate World in Hershey.  I've been going to Chocolate World for 43 years, and despite the technological advances and 1000% marketing blitz, it's still a pleasant (and free) side trek. 

All the girls were extremely well-behaved at Chocolate World and grabbing dinner.  The adults, on the other hand?  We apparently need Jesus.  The good news is that we had great servers and fast service, in spite of us, so the kids could get back to the hotel, get changed and finally get down to business. 

Not everyone Millie's team went to Chocolate World, but everyone played like they had spent the whole day on rides at Hersheypark.  Missed shots, poor decisions, and a lack of hustle turns sure routs into only 10 and 15 point wins.  Luckily, her team has a deep bench, and as girls got their act together, those players got more playing time.  
Millie taking her back-up Center role seriously.
For Millie's games, the scoreboard mistakes were still near forgivable and correctable.   Maja's games began the downward spiral.

We figured Maja's team had already played an incredibly tough schedule, and a wave of .500 teams with their own brushes against the elite teams was only fitting.  Somewhere in the 2nd half of the first game, the scorekeeper just decided to ignore a few baskets by the other team.  A few of the other team's parents knew, as the team scorekeeper, I knew, but nothing was done, so a solid nine-point win for the girls was actually a much closer four-point win.  Thankfully, Maja finally hit her stride, scoring 8 points, with two 3-pointers, to keep them ahead. 

Game two for Maja the scorekeeper stopped tallying up their baskets, and it was much earlier than a 20-point mercy rule might incline a person to.   Even the third game was a comedy of foul shots going to the wrong team, and a lot of gratuitous clock running and stoppages which luckily help her team out.  

The Championship game took the cake.   Maja's team finally got another rematch with the "hated" Chargers from the fall, and slowly but surely, built up a lead.  Up 24-14 in the 2nd half, the scoreboard operator must have kicked the plug for the scoreboard, turning it off, and wiping any and all memory of what things were.  Once it turned back on, there was a whole ordeal of whether there were 13 minutes left, 9 minutes, or even 7.  After that came to an amicable agreement, the score was reset.  Maja's team got 23 points (the scorekeeper never acknowledged the "double touchdown" motion of the refs for a crucial 3-pointer, and no matter what the complaint was there was no way to convincing her otherwise.  

For the Chargers, of course she put 20 points on the scoreboard.

Wait, what?  

Even the Charger parents were amused but their sudden windfall.

Maja's team played great and won 40-32 officially, but in reality, won 41-22.  

It was there first championship for the season, a long one that has seen them play 5 of the Top 15 teams in the Mid-Atlantic, and now are finally over .500, at 6-5.
Millie's team went to the championship game, as expected and faced a gargantuan team of decent ability.  Unlike previous years, when they won with 6, 7, maybe 8 players if they were lucky, this year's group could be rotated in to take some lumps, dish them out, and give the exhausted players some much needed rest.  This year's team also has some extra height to absorb the abuse vertically and not exhaust everyone by contesting rebounds.
Stopping for dinner, and a series of drop-offs of friends and teammates, we got home around 10pm Sunday night.  

I wish a scoreboard operator could change THAT time.  

And now for the Power Index;

Clutch (my daughter's team) played Collegeville in the finals, and their victory not only catapulted their rating higher up, but boosted Collegeville's rating. 

For Maja's team, the winning record finally stops my reasoning for not ranking them.  
Since the index counts opponents winning percentage, and the average winning percentage of teams those opponents play, it was important to bring up this statistical assault. 

There have been 364 teams participating in "AAU" tournaments this fall

Of those 364, 88 have played at least 9 games thus far. 

Of those 88, Maja's team is 4th overall for toughest strength of schedule. 

And they're the only team with a winning record in that top 12 . 

Tuesday, May 17, 2022

(Star Wars d6) #38 - Destination: Alderaan

   The Current Crew of the Pretio

Ne'vets Aharo - an exotic animal broker, both legal and otherwise, majority owner in the Pretio.
Evus - Twi'lek free mercenary, Ne'vets' armed muscle with a keen eye and a tendency to shoot first.
Tarrie - Human pilot "under contract" to fly the Pretio, and drive the Piscopo.  Brother of potential terrorist, rebel  Latorna Savvn. His climbing skills are suspect, but his grenade skills make up for it.  Edging a dangerous lifestyle of drugs, booze, and loose women
Frokazza - Wookie co-pilot, mechanic, and unarmed muscle. Very distrustful, and that anxiety gives him skin issues.
Duk'k - Sipsk'ud Bounty Hunter, recently rescued by the crew.  Offering his services in order to get off this barely existing hunk of mud.  His warning shots are dead center mass kill shots.
Kafla Thingvellir - Billionaire entrepreneur turned zoological enthusiast, in search of the Translucent Chromatic Trapper.

Destination: Alderaan 
With the (soon-to-be) Thingvellir's Translucent Trapper 
Safely secured and sedated in the hull of the Pretio
The crew has taken Kafla Thingvellir up on his offer 
To transport the creature to Alderaan for the 
Imperial Zoological Symposium and Exhibition.

Recently paid for their services by the eclectic billionaire, 
What will the crew do with their hard-earned gains, what hijinks
Can they get themselves into, and what the heck 
Is a Symposium?

After weeks of tedium of searching for the elusive Translucent Trapper with billionaire and amateur biologist, Kafla Thingvellir, the crew found themselves with the second most tedious thing:  Personally flying Kafla to the Imperial Zoological Symposium and Exhibition on Alderaan. Even with helping him set of the required display and presentation required to "name" his find, there was plenty of downtime, so the core crew would congregate in the cockpit, drink cheap hooch, and shoot the proverbial breeze.

Tarrie set a nerve early, "I know he's like awesome and stuff, but can we trust him."

"As much as his warning shots!  Did you see what he did to that baby Pengo!" Nev'ets exclaimed.

"Hey that used to be me...."  Evus whined.

"Shoot more younglings, and you'd get your street cred back."  Frokazza roared.

During the flight, Evus helped Frokazza which some much needed maintenance on the ship, as well as repairing the gun turret on the Piscopo, and preparing for future investments, specifically a bacta tank and figuring out where else guns could be mounted on the ship.  

Stopping at Wroona to refuel, Kafla felt great about the adventure.  He no one longer cared about all the fame he was about the garner from the discovery.  Bigger deeds were already on the horizon.  In order to talk to others about his deed, he offered to buy the crew a real meal in the city, a chance to mingle with others.  No one on the crew argued with a free meal.

Tarrie took one last look at the Trapper before leaving for dinner, doling out another dose of the sedation medication keeping it unconscious... just in case.

A few drinks into dinner, and Kafla's annoying story came with a shocking reveal.  He wasn't interested in the fame or money, per se.  Rather, the recognition and a few credits will get him a noble title and a chance for his kid's to live better opportunities. 

Plus, with his money, he could achieve his life-long dream of building and living in a castle.

Only thing the kept Tarrie from wringing the neck of Kafla was the fact that the pilot went blackout drunk on his fourth drink.  Within the slurry which was his mind, he pondered shooting Kaflas, but by the time the Wookie returned from the refresher.  Tarrie was collapsed beside even druken Kafla.

Days later, the Pretio arrived in Alderann.  They were still days early for the symposium

Even before Tarrie had powered down the engines, Kafla has manually lowered the cargo lifts, and a whole team of humans were unloading everything related to the Translucent Trapper.   A few early bribes looked like they greased the bureaucratic wheels of customs.  Before Ne'vets had filled out his first customs form, Kafla was be off the ship, at his hotel, and hiring a team to revise his presentation.

Before he left, he thanked the crew again for his help, told them to do what they wished with all the other samples they had collected and cataloged. 

"Hey, I've confirmed my presentation for the Translucent Trapper will be in the sports arena.  Big reveal!  I'll get you tickets sent to your hotel room. If you're going to do anything here, you'll need new clothes! 

Tarrie was game, "Shopping Trip!!!"

They left Ne'vets with a crushing pile of paperwork and paid a taxi to transport them to the downtown Alderaan City shopping district to fill all sorts of needs for the crew.

Frokazza picked out a pair of overalls, to prepare for the alleged Alderaan prudishness.  He also wiped out most medical stores for enough of his skin salve, and a few steroids to help with the skin condition, so it would clear up before they needed to visit the symposium 

Tarrie had spent hours in a back-alley stretch coverall outlet store.  Grabbing two "perfect" pair, he found a gold chain with his name spelled out.  He also bought a monocle on a whim.  He then disappeared into the higher end clothiers, and no one could find him.

Evus wandered off from the downtown and found a small multi-alien alley marketplace.  There, he found a Toydarian selling throwing stars and plethora of other items to fit in his room.

Duk'k bought a formal outfit, befitting his Sipsk'ud heritage, and a new set of battle armor from a Toydarian blacksmith named Hujess at his shop Horseshoes and Stuff .   And don't forget about his night vision goggles.

Ne'vets finally made it to their hotel later that night.  He immediately went to the cantina inside, "Beds and Steins." to find the crew.

It was trivia night, and the crew was doing horribly to "Win Beds and Steins Money"

The crew had dressed up their new outfits and were celebrating their good fortune with drinks.

Evus wore a power suit without a shirt underneath.

Frokazza was feeling mighty uncomfortable in his Wookie overalls.

Duk'k had stowed away his new armor and had come down in business casual: A sleeveless turtleneck and mirror shades.

And Tarrie?  Tarrie had found some flamboyant demon bird costume.

Ne'vets had questions, "Did you get robbed?"

"No, why?"

"Nevermind, you look good."

"I'm saving up for a codpiece and a cane." Tarrie interjected

Ne'vet could only follow up with, "We'll blend in well.  I think your subtleness can still attract attention."

After a great night out, the spent the next few days, finalizing the displays and presentations and dispersing around the campus at night.  

Everyone else knew that Ne'vets was up to some late-night gambling, but no details who or how well he was doing.  He was coming back with all body parts attached, so they didn't see a reason to push their luck.

Evus tried to audit a course at the University in veterinary sciences.  Not much to add to his own skills, but a "Free" Twi'lek takes advantages of those opportunities.  

Tarrie spent weeks outside a college campus. with too much available to drink.  He was banned from the cantina for yelling out wrong answers during Trivia.  One night, he left his pants to his costume back at the hotel, and never came back.  He had even eluded the searches of his closest friend, Frokazza.

With all those worries, the rest of the crew finished up the presentation, studied it, and packed it up for the university staff to assemble in the Convention Hall, "Unknown Lizards of Uninhabited Worlds."

No one expected Tarrie to show up, but as it crept closer to the morning open, there was still no sign of Ne'vets.  That left Evus, Duk'k, and Frokazza at the display, with at least 5,000 scholarly folk working their way into the facility...

Next: #39 - The Imperial Zoological Symposium and Exposition