(Gnome Wars) Say Hi to the Princesses for Me!

Although they were never properly statted out, did you know Brigade Games actually produced Princess Gnomes for a short time? 

They were produced a bit after the Americans were released.  My only point of reference is that when Maja was around three, we were using the female medic/nun/Florence Nightingale as a stand-in princess for our games. 

We'll be integrating them in to the Historicon Mega-Game.  Helpless captives, or royalty gone feral, leading their own tribe? 

In the Queue - It's beginning to look like Reaper Christmas minis, a few more Gnomes, and continuing to work on the Soviet females... and Tomb of the Serpent filler figures.

Project: 350 -   Not tracking during the holiday week cures my fragile ego, as the backlog drops significantly to 470 (279 drafts/191 scheduled) from 482 (283/199) way back on the 21st of November.  Probably will follow up right before the holiday post deluge, which is followed up by the #CharacterCreationChallenge in January, one of the months (along with August) that I don't track my productivity. 

(Gnome Wars) Cascadia and the Dual Columbias

It's been a good long while since I've added any Gnomish History to the page.  As a reminder, please consider all this positive fluff to add to your game, but it's certainly unofficial.

And all this is inspired by a lone Union Gnome figure left in a box that needed to be painted... differently.

Cascadia and the Dual Histories: 1836-1910

The 1830's brought expansion to the Pacific Northwest.  At the beginning  of the American Uncivil War, there was a well-timed onset of the Gnomish Wanderlust that brought thousands from American soil across the continent to peace, independence, and prosperity in a land called Columbia.  Around the same time, the British mercantile expansion finally hit the Canadian side of the Pacific, establishing some largely self-supporting trading posts and an independent navy.    As the German-American War drained assets across everyone's empires, the British Columbia politely snubbed their colonial ties from of any remaining tax revenue, and formally gained their own independence from Britain in 1900

• Columbia:  Its settlers emphasized industry, trade, and exploration, establishing a network of interior river towns and forest outposts. Columbia’s culture reflected a rugged but kind practicality, with towns clustered along rivers and fertile valleys, and its society influenced by a mixture of the Northern and Southern practicalities.  Columbia units prior to 1907 should be Northern American Gnomes with a mixture of Midnight Blue and even Black uniforms.
• British Columbia: Very quickly, this colony shed it's direct allegiance to, if not the name.  Their interior was largely untouched, focusing only on lumber to fuel the shipbuilding industry, to support the powerful fishing concerns, and continue to grow a sizable navy.  British Columbian units should use British Marines with a darker red for land forces, and a powder blue for naval marines. 

The Columbia Civil War (1905)

Despite peacefully coexisting for decades with the lack of any formal treaties, or even basic acknowledgement of each other, things came to a head in 1905.  Tensions around trade routes, both water and land, resource control (particularly a "Gem Rush" around the border), and long competing visions of the region led to the brief but intense Columbia Civil War.

Lasting only 18 months, it largely consisting of skirmishes along contested areas.  Neither side wanted to levy an army from an unwilling populace, and general malaise and exhaustion quickly led to the both sides meeting and accomplishing far more than a cease fire or a peace treaty.    

The Cascadian Public Safety Force 1907-1910 (present)

Neither side could see any reasons not to benefit from both sides of Greater Columbia.  They formed the Cascadian Confederation to secure their borders with crazy Californians and Mormons to the south, Russian aggression from Alaska, and to maintain a steady influence to avoid native incursions from the east. 

The Cascadian Confederation adopted the more efficient bureaucratic systems of British Columbia to the confederate towns and regions of Columbia.  It's not perfect solution, but neither was fighting nearly identical gnomes in the same area.

Former military units for both sides were reorganized into the Cascadia Public Safety Force (CPSF).  Their domestic visibility was highlighted in bright orange uniforms to promote them as Keepers of the Public Trust & Health.  While not properly documented, it would not be surprising if the CPSF forces in fortresses along the California border also have an all-black Columbia uniform in their lockers, just in case their forces are required to cross the border. 

Get Your Christmas Lists In Now!

 

(Gamma World) Not a Test #100 - The Wedding of Lathar and Thunnelda

You are all invited to Riverbend, to celebrate the wedding between Thunnelda Haycock to Lathar Bracken.

================= 

Lathar Bracken: A pure-strain human from River Bend.  He's got the muscle, the face, and a mount for most encounters.  Lathar's trusty beast of burden, No Name, travels wherever he does.   Looking for trouble in all the right places. The two-time champion of the Fair-Town Queen's Joust.

Thunnelda Haycock:  A peculiar local woman, who has a penchant for wandering the surrounding territories for particular oddities, but has become the fiancé of Lathar. She is a day away from marrying the man of her dreams, Lathar.

Sneaky Pete: A mutated weasel scout.  Pete's telepathy and night vision take a backseat when he whips out his electrical powers.  Apparently addicted to his newly uncovered yellow powder found at "The Pool House"

Sonny Helianthus: a nearly 10' tall sentient sunflower artifact examiner with four arms, and trusted Restorationist ties. Knowledgeable,  but not a good one with device repairs or upgrades. 

Slitheran Wurmtail (aka Squiggles): a mutated earthworm scout, in impromptu power armor, looking for trouble in all the wrong places,  and finding it often.   He  has been subject to genetic testing and developed super-human strength, a more human body, and a thick coat of shaggy white hair.  He may be pregnant... again!

Ramsay: Mutant Ram, traveling from KIA Academy to reunite with his fellow explorers for the wedding. 

RHA-9:   Living Metal used in research experiments.  Abandoned by the De Facto Explorers when they escaped KIA Academy.

Friar Spiess:  The mysterious Pure-Strain human mentor to Lathar from back in the day.  Arriving in town today to conduct the wedding. 

================================================================

Lathar woke up with the taste of old goat in his mouth, regret in his throbbing head, and the two sharp pains from his buttocks.  His first sight was RHA-9's  lit-up yellow eyes looming over him.

RHA-9: “Greetings, groom-unit. You were unconscious. I remained vigilant.”

Lathar rubbed his eyes, still uncomfortable, and very naked on the couch.

RHA-9: “I already injected you with a refreshing electrolyte solution to reduce post-fermentation biological distress?”

Lathar: “Just—get me my damn clothes.”

-------------------------------

Meanwhile, across town, Thunnelda was in full bride-mode panic.

Her sister-in-law and  Gretka, the local teen with a green thumb, and who was only supposed to deliver the flowers this morning, were fussing over her. The new wedding dress, hastily repaired and adjusted overnight, was being draped over her frame as  Gretka aggressively tried to do anything with her hair..

Thunnelda: “Where’s my bouquet?”

Gretka: “The flowers are right here...."

Thunnelda: “The GOOD bouquet. Not the one that smells like old radscorpion and goat feces.”

The young girl fidgeted.

Thunnelda: "You lost it."

Gretka: “I DID NOT lose it! It just... moved.”

Cue another cutaway, this time to one of Drogo's goats,  happily munching on the missing bouquet outside the town walls.

Thunnelda’s eye twitched. “Fine. We’ll make another. Where’s the officiant?”

Her sister-in-law pretended to peak out the window.... "Not here..." 

The lovely Thunnelda Haycock

The Arrival of Friar Spiess

Upriver from town, a  large, stoic, solitary man worked his way towards Riverbend.   He's robes covered much of him, and a greatsword strapped to his back. 

This was Friar Spiess, the original mentor of Lathar, whom Lathar personally invited from his distant monastery of pure-strain humans to officiate the wedding.

Friar Spiess, the Pure-Strain Monk of the Unbroken Line

Lathar's relatives, the Bone Cracker Clan had set up camp far upriver of the town, and were engaged in some raucous sport involving a ball and a lot of tackling.  Only one of the of the cousins took noticed of the imposing figure.   Even though the Friar could not detect a hint of corruption from the glow... from any of them, not all pure-strained humans were worthy to be in his presence.  Lathar was obviously the exception to this family....

He began to pass the farms on the outskirts of town, getting closer to Lathar's house.  He scoffed at the scene of a group of... human-like worms.... dressed to the nines, inside what he could only guess was an old pig stye.   The world was different out here....

He finally got inside the flimsy palisade protecting the town and reached a small house just inside.  The clapboard is yellow and pealing, the half-rotting fence surrounding the abode, and keeping within the a host of oddities and junk.  The monk pushed the gate open and within a few steps, was accosted by an angry peacock.  

Friar Spiess deftly avoided the bird's peckings, and knocked on the door.  

Chambray, Lathar's peacock

The Reunion

Lathar certainly looked older to the monk, after many years apart.  The fact that he had a piece of Living Metal peering over his shoulder made Spiess smirk.

Lathar: "Friar Spiess, you made it!"

Friar Spiess: "You asked, I'm here. You've grown!" 

Lathar: "I have, but I have not forgotten all the lessons you've taught me...."

It was a barbaric place, full of the tainted, but if Lathar could maintain his composure in such a place, Friar Spiess would be respectful to his wishes.

Lathar Bracken

Friar Spiess: "What about this girl you've met?"

Lathar: "Listen, I'm looking forward to this wedding, but she can get antsy quick... I trust your judgement."

Friar Spiess: "I'll do what's proper... let's get you ready... but why does this house smell like drunken goat and turnip wine?”

A Very Pregnant Squiggles

Squiggles, ready to give birth, herded his children towards the clearing where the wedding was going to occur.  Most of them were going to be used a free labor, cooking food, serving drinks.  

Upriver from town, there was a sudden boom—a familiar, ominous sound.  As he neared the palisade gate, members of the Bone Cracker clan, Lathar's family, arrived, many naked, purple, and with burns the earthworm had seen previously on a plant. 

"Where did those people find a Boomfruit grenade?"  Squiggles asked himself.

Squiggles

The collection of chairs and bench out in the clearing were filling up with a number of folks.  Many of the townsfolk were there, some dignitaries from Fair-Town, the blue-skinned Kirothians had sent a delegation, none of whom Lathar had dated.  Even the animal domain known as Parr, across the Big River, had sent two otters.  

Most conspicuous was the arrival of Lathar's grandmother, Helka.  No one knew where she had run off to, but know she had returned, wearing spiny plate armor, trying to hold a silly vow to stay silent for her smartest grandchild's big day.  

As Lathar arrived, Friar Spiess by his side, Helka could focus on something other than Lathar's choice of bride. 

"Lathar, where'd you get the birthday cake?  Aren't you going to introduce us."

Friar Spiess knew he was in trouble, but she was pure-strain... and obviously worthy.

Grandma Helka, "The Iron Maw"

"When am I going to meet the bride?"  the monk asked again.

The rest of the De Facto Explorers arrived.  "Sneaky" Pete, a weasel with a derby, a mandolin, and oddly yellow stained paws and snout. 

"Sneaky" Pete

And a nine and a half foot tall sunflower, with four arms, reading the flimsy book of the Ancients oblivious to everything else going on.  

Dr Sonny Helianthus, during shorter times (with only two limbs)

The Short-Short Version

Friar Speiss did spy Thunnelda, the dear bride, working her way down the aisle.  As she reached her groom, the monk decided the celebration needed to start early.

"Do you?" he asked Thunnelda.

"Yes?" 

He turned to Lathar, "Do you?"

"Yes!"

"Good, you're married." 

Thunnelda did know if she wanted to be happy or sad with the egregious brevity this strange man had married them.  

Pete was the first to compose himself, strumming his mandolin and singing the song he wrote for them.

"Hinged Together"

Verse 1
Oh, Thunnelda, you’re the strength that I need,
Like the iron on these hinges, you’re steady indeed.
When the world is breaking, you hold your line,
Just a girl from Riverbend, forever entwined.

Chorus
We’re hinged together, swingin’ free,
From the east to the west, it’s just you and me.
Every open door, every closing sound,
Thunnelda and Lathar, where love’s unbound.

Verse 2
With the rust and the grind of life’s heavy door,
You’ve taught me to fight, you’ve shown me there’s more.
These hinges might creak, and they’ll sometimes bend,
But with you, Thunnelda, they’ll never end.

Bridge
Through battles and storms, and glow-sickness too,
I’ll hold strong to these hinges, and I’ll hold on to you.
From broken bolts to splintered wood,
With each turn of the key, love’s understood.

Chorus
We’re hinged together, swingin’ free,
From the east to the west, it’s just you and me.
Every open door, every closing sound,
Thunnelda and Lathar, where love’s unbound.

Verse 3
So here’s to the hinges that hold us tight,
To the doors we’ve opened in the dead of night.
My Thunnelda, my anchor, my iron grace,
Together, forever, in our hinge-embrace.

Outro
Yeah, we’re hinged together, swingin’ free,
With the strength of love, that nobody sees.
From the first creak to the last soft sound,
Thunnelda and Lathar—forever bound.

Half-way through, Sonny took notice to the music, and pulled out his own makeshift mandolin.

As the bride and groom moved over to the food and drink, guest were still arriving, including Justinian and his entourage from the Restorationists.  

And as Thunnelda and Lathar had their first dance, there was a prominent "SPLURT" near one of the tables. 

Squiggles gave birth to her children, all 174 of them....

"My wedding gift to you.... some wedding release butterflies, some release doves... you guys get 174 baby worms."

Squiggles and his older children stopped everything and collected the newest children, and took them to the safety of the shed at Farmer Yulius' farm. 

Once the songs and dances were complete, and somehow, put sawdust over the site of the worm delivery, Pete presented a wrapped gift to the happy couple.

And incredibly ornate hinge that Pete commissioned for them .

It was enough to bring a tear to both of them.

The wedding, the turnip wine, the many many goats, and the celebration oddly went off without a hitch.  It might be the most successful, most memorable wedding of all time in Riverbend. 

A few things came to light post-wedding:

• Friar Spiess survived the amorous assault by Grandma Helka
• Sonny hung out with his brethren, the Restorationists.  Even he noticed a new treasure of the ancients around the neck of Luna, a recent addition to the organization.  The items, "headphones" attach to a communication box she uncovered as she wandered the Glow Zones, at least two days travel past the old Hisser village across the Big River.  Sounds like some more R&R is needed to recover but they may not return immediately to their "Pool Room"
• Pete did amazingly well conversing with the Otter representatives from Parr.  Other adventure leads might be in their future.
• Friar Spiess finally took a moment to look at poor Pete and his strange addiction to a the dark-yellow powder.  The man chuckled when he realized the weasel was addicted to... yellow curry powder.

Finally, Lathar and Thunnelda, road off on No-Name into the woods, to set up a campsite and spend a few days together.  It was that time when Thunnelda finally admitted that she was already pregnant... and Lathar was the father.

GM Notes: It's fitting that a big wedding occurs during the 100th episode of the campaign.

Next:  #101 - Post-Martial Bliss

(Painting) Kitty Christmas Objective Markers

I bemoan the general decline at Michael's.  Everything I normally go there for is out of stock, no longer carried, or expensive as hell.  I begrudgingly go down another block to Hobby Lobby (six days a week).  In one of my forays this fall, I fell upon this lovable guys as Christmas ornaments  (and 50% off).  The kids approve and now I just need to make rules for them... just enough energy and apathy at the same time. 

Another Month of New Gaming (December 2025)

 I can't even....

Another month, another issue of Game Trade Magazine from Alliance Games Distribution, and I've been conjecturing conspiracy about the Diamond bankruptcy affecting its game subsidiary, with a few months with a lot of "Featured Items" that were already in print and in stock.  

This month we are just waylayed by Kickstarters finally delivering at the retail level.  Kickstarters with a $75-150 base game and a dozen or more $25+ accessories and expansions, per game.  It's outright ridiculous, and as an imaginary store owner, I refuse to even ponder ordering a full array, even for the bigger stores, without some massive support, or full-buy-in from the staff.

Issue #310 of Game Trade Magazine can be found at your FLGS or online as a pdf here. 

ViscountEric's Want List

None

ViscountEric's Money-Is-No-Object Want List

None

The Imaginary Store List (The Pegleg Gnome)

Absolute Tabletop 

Aether Nexus RPG .................................................. $28.95

The Mecha Hack RPG: Mission Manual ................ $23.95

Space Base: Genesis Expansion .............................. $29.99

Tiny Towns: Architects Expansion .......................... $29.99

Ape Games

Major General ................................................. $15.00

Order of the Stick: Adventure Game Deluxe.. $55.00

Pampero .......................................................... $150.00

Sometimes I would like to order something this expensive just to see what the hell is inside. I'm assuming the description in the solicitation is doing a good job to explain some game mechanics, and it's nothing that should be higher than half this price.  And even crazier, for $150, you can still by additional expansions at $25-30 a pop. 

Whale Riders Board Game ............................... $40.00

Whale Riders Card Game ................................. $25.00

Because Reiner Knizia can't wait to spread these out.  

Arc Dream Publishing

Delta Green: Artifact Zero ............................... $19.99

Delta Green: Owlshead Mountain ................... $19.99

Delta Green: The New Age ............................. $24.99

Catalyst Game Labs

Leviathans: Great War - Starter Box ............... $69.99

Chaosium 

Pendragon RPG: The Sauvage King ............... $29.99

Chessex

Way back in September of last year, I had a rant on Chessex's new $23 "Mega-hedral 7-Die Set" .  I haven't seen any in any store labelled as such, and I just can't justify order dice without knowing how big these things are, when there are fancier dice available.  

Cryptozoic Entertainment

Cats of Catthulhu RPG: Box Set - 10th Anniversary ........ $99.99

Cats of Catthulhu RPG: HC - 10th Anniversary ................ $54.99

Cats of Catthulhu RPG: SC - 10th Anniversary ................. $34.99

Cubicle 7

Warhammer 40K RPG: Imperium Maledictum  - Voll Adventures ... $39.99

Devir Americas

1902 Melies ..................................................... $26.99

1911 Admunsen vs Scott ................................. $22.99

1920 Wall Street .............................................. $24.99

1980 Sixtina .................................................... $26.99

1987 Channel Tunnel ...................................... $24.99

1998 ISS .......................................................... $26.99

Rudolph ............................................................ $13.99

Spring ............................................................... $13.99

The White Castle Duel ..................................... $34.99

Enhance Gaming 

I thought this was an expansion of the previous companies product line, but it is NOT.  Another company, another set of shoulder bags, backpacks, and TCG accessories.. and NO PRICING.  Already did research on the first, not the type of product I'll delve into a second company to fill in inventory, at least not at the first company's pricing. 

Explore Dungeons

Heroic Adventure! #2 Vault of the Murderworm (DCC) ................... $19.99

Optional covers available. 

Heroic Adventure! #2 Vault of the Murderworm  Poster Map Pack ......$30.00

Heroic Adventure! #2.1 The Wormfather's Apprentice ......................... $14.99

FASA Games

Earthdawn Plush: Mountainshadow ................... $35.00

Earthdawn Plush: Usin ....................................... $35.00

I did not have "Earthdawn Plush Dragons" on my 2025 bingo card.

Free League Publishing

Coriolis RPG: The Great Dark - The Flowers of Algorab ............. $49.99

Gold Seal Games

By the Seashore ................................................ $14.99

Four Forests ...................................................... $19.99

Loot Dispute ..................................................... $19.99

Whiskers & Tails .............................................. $14.99

Goodman Games

Xcrawl Classics:  XCrawl Insider #2 ............... $10.99

Horrible Guild

A Carnivore Did It!  ...................................... $18.00

Mighty Boards

Rebirth ........................................... $55.00

Modiphius 

Acthung!  Cthulhu 2d20: Horrors of the Secret War ................ $40.00

Cohors Cthulhu RPG: Player's Guide ......................... $47.00

Cohors Cthulhu RPG: Quickstart ................................ $20.00

Cohors Cthulhu RPG: Gamemaster's Guide ............... $60.00

Cohors Cthulhu RPG: Germania Adventure Book ..... $47.00

Cohors Cthulhu RPG: GM Toolkit .............................. $41.00

Cohors Cthulhu RPG: Legends of Laurium Fiction Anthology ... $20.00

Fallout RPG: Royal Flush ........................................... $44.00

Star Trek Adventures RPG 2nd Ed - Exploration Guide $42.00

Monte Cook Games

The Darkest Woods (5e) ............................................. $54.99

Old Gods of Appalachia - All Your Gods Are Dead ... $44.99

Need Games

Piaga 1348 RPG ........................................................... $44.90

This was a cool item to pick for the #FreeRPGDay promotion.

Paizo Publishing

Pathfinder Quest .............................................. $119.99

Pathfinder RPG: Adventure Season of Ghosts HC .... $79.99

Pathfinder RPG: Dark Archive (Remastered)  HC ..... $64.99

Pathfinder RPG: Flip Mats - Boreal Forest ................ $19.99

Pathfinder RPG: Flip Mats - Grand Masion Multi-Pack ........ $29.99

Starfinder RPG: Alien Core Pocket Edition ............... $29.99

Starfinder RPG:  Alien Core Token Box .................... $59.99

Starfinder RPG:  Flip Mat - Imperial Bases ............... $19.99

Pinnacle Entertainment Group

Savage Worlds RPG: Rifts - Europa .......................... $44.99

Savage Worlds RPG: Rifts - Europa Accessories ...... $29.99

Savage Worlds RPG: Rifts - Map Pack 4 - Europa Battlefields .... $14.99

Savage Worlds RPG: Rifts - Savage Foes of Europa ..................... $29.99

Playpunk

Zenith .................................. $34.99

Ravensburger

Lorcana TCG: Whispers in the Well Boosters 

Lorcana TCG: Whispers in the Well Starters

Lorcana TCG: Whispers in the Well Illumineer's Trove

Lorcana TCG: Whispers in the Well Playmats (Jasmine, Mickey Mouse)

Rogue Games

Colonial Gothic RPG: A Heart in a Jar ........................ $12.95

Sirius Dice 

RPG Dice Set (7) - Golden Buzz ................................. $17.99

RPG Dice Set (7) - Golden Pup ................................... $17.99

RPG Dice Set (7) - Moon Panda .................................. $17.99

RPG Dice Set (7) - Seaform Shepherd ......................... $17.99

RPG Dice Set (7) - Royal Nectar .................................. $17.99

RPG Dice Set (7) - Shimmerpaw .................................. $17.99

RPG Dice with appropriate symbols instead of the top number on the die. 

Speedrobo GAmes

Necromansters: Core Set .......................................... $24.95

Spielwiese

Snake Charmers ....................................................... $19.99

Steamforged Games

Warmachine: Core Rulebook ................................. $44.99

Warmachine: Frozen & Forgotten 2 -Player Set .... $99.99

Tuesday Knight Games

Mothership RPG: Core Set .................................... $59.00

I actually checked, I can't find a solicitation for the actual rules, just third party supplements.

Mothership RPG: A Pound of Flesh ....................... $20.00

Mothership RPG: Dead Planet ............................... $20.00

Mothership RPG: Orphans ..................................... $20.00

Mothership RPG: Player's Survival Guide ............ $15.00

Mothership RPG: Shipbreaker's Toolkit ................ $50.00

Mothership RPG: Wages of Sin ............................  $50.00

Mothership RPG: Storage Box .............................. $10.00

Mothership RPG: Unconfirmed Contact Reports .. $20.00

Mothership RPG: Warden's Operations Manual .... $20.00

Why Not Games

Rocket Age: Blood Red Mars Savaged (SWADE) .... $45.00

WizKids

D&D Minis: Dire Worg ....................................... $24.99 Painted

D&D Minis: Dire Worg ....................................... $19.99 Unpainted

D&D Minis: Kraken ............................................ $69.99 Painted

D&D Minis: Kraken ............................................ $54.99 Unpainted

D&D Minis: Icons of the Realm - Monster Manual Collection II Booster Bricks.

Wonderful World Board Games

Seven Grave ......................... $15.00

SATLOF!

 There are no airing of grievances, and my only feats of strength is remind everyone that I can lift them into the air, but SATLOF is a great day to munch on food, reconnect with friends, and pray we get two different games done before we left.

The high point possibly for this weekend?  Maja finally has her license AND her car, so dear old Dad may get to imbibe more than a single drink.