(Gamma World) Not a Test #100 - The Wedding of Lathar and Thunnelda

You are all invited to Riverbend, to celebrate the wedding between Thunnelda Haycock to Lathar Bracken.

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Lathar Bracken: A pure-strain human from River Bend.  He's got the muscle, the face, and a mount for most encounters.  Lathar's trusty beast of burden, No Name, travels wherever he does.   Looking for trouble in all the right places. The two-time champion of the Fair-Town Queen's Joust.

Thunnelda Haycock:  A peculiar local woman, who has a penchant for wandering the surrounding territories for particular oddities, but has become the fiancé of Lathar. She is a day away from marrying the man of her dreams, Lathar.

Sneaky Pete: A mutated weasel scout.  Pete's telepathy and night vision take a backseat when he whips out his electrical powers.  Apparently addicted to his newly uncovered yellow powder found at "The Pool House"

Sonny Helianthus: a nearly 10' tall sentient sunflower artifact examiner with four arms, and trusted Restorationist ties. Knowledgeable,  but not a good one with device repairs or upgrades. 

Slitheran Wurmtail (aka Squiggles): a mutated earthworm scout, in impromptu power armor, looking for trouble in all the wrong places,  and finding it often.   He  has been subject to genetic testing and developed super-human strength, a more human body, and a thick coat of shaggy white hair.  He may be pregnant... again!

Ramsay: Mutant Ram, traveling from KIA Academy to reunite with his fellow explorers for the wedding. 

RHA-9:   Living Metal used in research experiments.  Abandoned by the De Facto Explorers when they escaped KIA Academy.

Friar Spiess:  The mysterious Pure-Strain human mentor to Lathar from back in the day.  Arriving in town today to conduct the wedding. 

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Lathar woke up with the taste of old goat in his mouth, regret in his throbbing head, and the two sharp pains from his buttocks.  His first sight was RHA-9's  lit-up yellow eyes looming over him.

RHA-9: “Greetings, groom-unit. You were unconscious. I remained vigilant.”

Lathar rubbed his eyes, still uncomfortable, and very naked on the couch.

RHA-9: “I already injected you with a refreshing electrolyte solution to reduce post-fermentation biological distress?”

Lathar: “Just—get me my damn clothes.”

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Meanwhile, across town, Thunnelda was in full bride-mode panic.

Her sister-in-law and  Gretka, the local teen with a green thumb, and who was only supposed to deliver the flowers this morning, were fussing over her. The new wedding dress, hastily repaired and adjusted overnight, was being draped over her frame as  Gretka aggressively tried to do anything with her hair..

Thunnelda: “Where’s my bouquet?”

Gretka: “The flowers are right here...."

Thunnelda: “The GOOD bouquet. Not the one that smells like old radscorpion and goat feces.”

The young girl fidgeted.

Thunnelda: "You lost it."

Gretka: “I DID NOT lose it! It just... moved.”

Cue another cutaway, this time to one of Drogo's goats,  happily munching on the missing bouquet outside the town walls.

Thunnelda’s eye twitched. “Fine. We’ll make another. Where’s the officiant?”

Her sister-in-law pretended to peak out the window.... "Not here..." 

The lovely Thunnelda Haycock

The Arrival of Friar Spiess

Upriver from town, a  large, stoic, solitary man worked his way towards Riverbend.   He's robes covered much of him, and a greatsword strapped to his back. 

This was Friar Spiess, the original mentor of Lathar, whom Lathar personally invited from his distant monastery of pure-strain humans to officiate the wedding.

Friar Spiess, the Pure-Strain Monk of the Unbroken Line

Lathar's relatives, the Bone Cracker Clan had set up camp far upriver of the town, and were engaged in some raucous sport involving a ball and a lot of tackling.  Only one of the of the cousins took noticed of the imposing figure.   Even though the Friar could not detect a hint of corruption from the glow... from any of them, not all pure-strained humans were worthy to be in his presence.  Lathar was obviously the exception to this family....

He began to pass the farms on the outskirts of town, getting closer to Lathar's house.  He scoffed at the scene of a group of... human-like worms.... dressed to the nines, inside what he could only guess was an old pig stye.   The world was different out here....

He finally got inside the flimsy palisade protecting the town and reached a small house just inside.  The clapboard is yellow and pealing, the half-rotting fence surrounding the abode, and keeping within the a host of oddities and junk.  The monk pushed the gate open and within a few steps, was accosted by an angry peacock.  

Friar Spiess deftly avoided the bird's peckings, and knocked on the door.  

Chambray, Lathar's peacock

The Reunion

Lathar certainly looked older to the monk, after many years apart.  The fact that he had a piece of Living Metal peering over his shoulder made Spiess smirk.

Lathar: "Friar Spiess, you made it!"

Friar Spiess: "You asked, I'm here. You've grown!" 

Lathar: "I have, but I have not forgotten all the lessons you've taught me...."

It was a barbaric place, full of the tainted, but if Lathar could maintain his composure in such a place, Friar Spiess would be respectful to his wishes.

Lathar Bracken

Friar Spiess: "What about this girl you've met?"

Lathar: "Listen, I'm looking forward to this wedding, but she can get antsy quick... I trust your judgement."

Friar Spiess: "I'll do what's proper... let's get you ready... but why does this house smell like drunken goat and turnip wine?”

A Very Pregnant Squiggles

Squiggles, ready to give birth, herded his children towards the clearing where the wedding was going to occur.  Most of them were going to be used a free labor, cooking food, serving drinks.  

Upriver from town, there was a sudden boom—a familiar, ominous sound.  As he neared the palisade gate, members of the Bone Cracker clan, Lathar's family, arrived, many naked, purple, and with burns the earthworm had seen previously on a plant. 

"Where did those people find a Boomfruit grenade?"  Squiggles asked himself.

Squiggles

The collection of chairs and bench out in the clearing were filling up with a number of folks.  Many of the townsfolk were there, some dignitaries from Fair-Town, the blue-skinned Kirothians had sent a delegation, none of whom Lathar had dated.  Even the animal domain known as Parr, across the Big River, had sent two otters.  

Most conspicuous was the arrival of Lathar's grandmother, Helka.  No one knew where she had run off to, but know she had returned, wearing spiny plate armor, trying to hold a silly vow to stay silent for her smartest grandchild's big day.  

As Lathar arrived, Friar Spiess by his side, Helka could focus on something other than Lathar's choice of bride. 

"Lathar, where'd you get the birthday cake?  Aren't you going to introduce us."

Friar Spiess knew he was in trouble, but she was pure-strain... and obviously worthy.

Grandma Helka, "The Iron Maw"

"When am I going to meet the bride?"  the monk asked again.

The rest of the De Facto Explorers arrived.  "Sneaky" Pete, a weasel with a derby, a mandolin, and oddly yellow stained paws and snout. 

"Sneaky" Pete

And a nine and a half foot tall sunflower, with four arms, reading the flimsy book of the Ancients oblivious to everything else going on.  

Dr Sonny Helianthus, during shorter times (with only two limbs)

The Short-Short Version

Friar Speiss did spy Thunnelda, the dear bride, working her way down the aisle.  As she reached her groom, the monk decided the celebration needed to start early.

"Do you?" he asked Thunnelda.

"Yes?" 

He turned to Lathar, "Do you?"

"Yes!"

"Good, you're married." 

Thunnelda did know if she wanted to be happy or sad with the egregious brevity this strange man had married them.  

Pete was the first to compose himself, strumming his mandolin and singing the song he wrote for them.

"Hinged Together"

Verse 1
Oh, Thunnelda, you’re the strength that I need,
Like the iron on these hinges, you’re steady indeed.
When the world is breaking, you hold your line,
Just a girl from Riverbend, forever entwined.

Chorus
We’re hinged together, swingin’ free,
From the east to the west, it’s just you and me.
Every open door, every closing sound,
Thunnelda and Lathar, where love’s unbound.

Verse 2
With the rust and the grind of life’s heavy door,
You’ve taught me to fight, you’ve shown me there’s more.
These hinges might creak, and they’ll sometimes bend,
But with you, Thunnelda, they’ll never end.

Bridge
Through battles and storms, and glow-sickness too,
I’ll hold strong to these hinges, and I’ll hold on to you.
From broken bolts to splintered wood,
With each turn of the key, love’s understood.

Chorus
We’re hinged together, swingin’ free,
From the east to the west, it’s just you and me.
Every open door, every closing sound,
Thunnelda and Lathar, where love’s unbound.

Verse 3
So here’s to the hinges that hold us tight,
To the doors we’ve opened in the dead of night.
My Thunnelda, my anchor, my iron grace,
Together, forever, in our hinge-embrace.

Outro
Yeah, we’re hinged together, swingin’ free,
With the strength of love, that nobody sees.
From the first creak to the last soft sound,
Thunnelda and Lathar—forever bound.

Half-way through, Sonny took notice to the music, and pulled out his own makeshift mandolin.

As the bride and groom moved over to the food and drink, guest were still arriving, including Justinian and his entourage from the Restorationists.  

And as Thunnelda and Lathar had their first dance, there was a prominent "SPLURT" near one of the tables. 

Squiggles gave birth to her children, all 174 of them....

"My wedding gift to you.... some wedding release butterflies, some release doves... you guys get 174 baby worms."

Squiggles and his older children stopped everything and collected the newest children, and took them to the safety of the shed at Farmer Yulius' farm. 

Once the songs and dances were complete, and somehow, put sawdust over the site of the worm delivery, Pete presented a wrapped gift to the happy couple.

And incredibly ornate hinge that Pete commissioned for them .

It was enough to bring a tear to both of them.

The wedding, the turnip wine, the many many goats, and the celebration oddly went off without a hitch.  It might be the most successful, most memorable wedding of all time in Riverbend. 

A few things came to light post-wedding:

• Friar Spiess survived the amorous assault by Grandma Helka
• Sonny hung out with his brethren, the Restorationists.  Even he noticed a new treasure of the ancients around the neck of Luna, a recent addition to the organization.  The items, "headphones" attach to a communication box she uncovered as she wandered the Glow Zones, at least two days travel past the old Hisser village across the Big River.  Sounds like some more R&R is needed to recover but they may not return immediately to their "Pool Room"
• Pete did amazingly well conversing with the Otter representatives from Parr.  Other adventure leads might be in their future.
• Friar Spiess finally took a moment to look at poor Pete and his strange addiction to a the dark-yellow powder.  The man chuckled when he realized the weasel was addicted to... yellow curry powder.

Finally, Lathar and Thunnelda, road off on No-Name into the woods, to set up a campsite and spend a few days together.  It was that time when Thunnelda finally admitted that she was already pregnant... and Lathar was the father.

GM Notes: It's fitting that a big wedding occurs during the 100th episode of the campaign.

Next:  #101 - Post-Martial Bliss