Saturday, October 18, 2014

(IOU) Professor Clarence Pittleman

We're two years removed from any action in my Risus: Illuminati University, but I'd kill a hobo for the chance to play another session.  Without further ado, I present to you for your consideration, Professor Clarence Pittleman.
A scene from campus (L to R,  Pittleman, Grover, and  a Trustee)
Professor Clarence Pittleman
Telekinetic Talking Coffee Plant (7)
Weird Science Gadgeteer (5)
Absent Minded Professor (3)
Supreme Coffee Bean (2)
Hyper Active Coffee Junkie (1)
Bill Cosby Fanatic (1)

Equipment:  "The Pittlecraft", a Pope Hat, leather coat & turtleneck, Fake Hitler Moustache, Siracha Sauce/Fix a Flat Gun

Enemy: C.T.H.U.L.H.U (8+ on 2d6)

Professor Pittleman was one of hundreds of adjunct faculty on campus desperately trying the acclaim or profitability to be offered the ever elusive gift of tenure.  He was working on some genetically modified plants (Monsanto ain't got 'nuttin on IOU) when a lab experiment turned him into a sentient coffee plant!

No, I said a sentient Bush...
With his haphazard paperwork faculty paperwork filled out, and lack of the form FK175 "Transferative Legal  Standing of a Metamorphized or Altered Faculty Member, Clarence  was not assigned classes  to teach, but rather enrollment paperwork as a Freshthing!  Three semesters  later, the mix  up has yet to be cleared up, but he is a Sophmore with a 4.0 GPA and a crippling pile of debt.

Pittleman did discover early on that he could move matter with his mind, which helped him construct "The Pittlecraft" to fly around campus.  The Pittlecraft is nothing more than an old fashioned '50's mixing bowl with an occilating fan duct tape to it's bottom, all wired together with one of those old electronics kits from Radio Shack to make an effective hovercraft.

Since he (re)started school, Clarence has also learned to manipulate the ripe coffee beans of his body as projectile weapons.  This hasn't been fully mastered quite yet.

Last Update (9/20/2015)

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