Monday, December 11, 2023

Attack of the Inflatable Zombie Pirates

Oh my, has the fall been super busy!   Weekends with my girls are usually hours of practice, hours of sporting events, and even more stuff, turning those truly free days into days of much-needed near-comatose rest at Dad's.  

It's been so crazy that the scheduled Halloween game never happened, and with the high school play that Maja's in taking up a large chuck of Friday night and Saturday, we had a narrow window Sunday for rest, Christmas decorating, and the normal Christmas game... with a Halloween theme.

In Plasticville, Halloween was marred by two unrelated crimes.  Normally the theft of popular Inflatable Zombie Pirates would make frontpage headlines in the Plasticville Press, but a rash of child abductions nearly paralyzed the town. 

As Christmas neared, and there was no sign of the children, some townsfolk turned to the local Christmas Market to distract their weary souls.  The side streets near the church were cordoned off, and the seasonal booths built for vendors.  

The big difference this year?  The Inflatable Zombie Pirates have been found, they're alive, and they're killing townsfolk and setting fires to buildings.  


Only eight individuals have taken up arms to fight back, and perhaps find a way to lift the curse.  They were all elves at pictures with Santa.  It was bad enough that the company the town hired to set up pictures with Santa sent adult garden gnomes costumes, but now they have to fight giant Inflatable Zombie Pirates with a few rifles some garden tools, and a replica sword?    The things we all do over the holidays for extra money.... 

The "Gnomes" rifles seemed to easily drop two of the Inflatables, but the noise seem to drag all of them across the board.   Free of the restraints of a electrical cord, these magical constructs swiftly floated towards the gnomes and showed to be overpowering adversaries in melee.  

The gnomes would not retreat!  Another two were dropped as the pitchfork/pick axe wielding ones dove into combat and ripped the monsters to shreds.  
Just as the gnomes appeared to gain the upper hand, a cruel twist of fate (re: a Joker was pulled)  befall the day.  A few, but not all, of the "dead" Inflatable Zombie Pirates, the ones the just fell limp from their wounds, began to inflate again and move forward!  

As the second wave of Inflatables crashed into the surviving gnomes, all seemed lost.  Many cruelly perished, and those that survived fought valiantly, but futilely, against the monsters. 

The only salvation came in the form of one of Millie's gnomes, who skirt the far side of the board, avoided all contact with the monsters, and reached the church.  It took two turns of searching inside the church, but he was able to metaphysically unplug the creatures and they dropped.  
Our hero!
You can simply file this under a horde of magically constructs gone wrong, or take a more sinister Five Night's at Freddy's take on it.   This batch of gamers were mixed in their voting.  

The scenario was originally inspired by the Pulp Alley game "Demon Cow Infestation" and the oversized zombie pirates for a $1/bag at Dollar General during Halloween.  

The Inflatable Zombie Pirates will return one day!!

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